Colossal red king crab legs

ChatGPT rewriting Hollywood Baby to be about our 3 legged cat, Reishi.

2023.03.25 06:34 Emeraldcitylove_206 ChatGPT rewriting Hollywood Baby to be about our 3 legged cat, Reishi.

ChatGPT rewriting Hollywood Baby to be about our 3 legged cat, Reishi. submitted by Emeraldcitylove_206 to 100gecs [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 06:28 Insomniac616 Need DC characters to do a tier list for.

If you have multiple suggestions, please make multiple comments. Top upvoted wins a tier list. None of the following returnees please (If you dont follow these simple instructions, your suggestion will have to be disqualified):
Wonder Woman
Batman
Superman
Deathstroke
Lex Luthor
Green Arrow
The Flash
The Joker
Doomsday
Bane
Batman Beyond
Raven
Doctor Fate
Nightwing
Darkseid
Aquaman
Shazam
Green Lantern
Lobo
Static
Black Canary
Booster Gold
Wally West (I'll allow Wally West as Kid Flash though, just not his version of The Flash)
Red Hood
Batgirl
Reverse Flash
Harley Quinn
Zatanna
Black Adam
Adam West Batman (already did a tier list for)
Plastic Man (already did a tier list for)
The Riddler (already did a tier list for)
The Ventriloquist & Scarface (already did a tier list for)
Atrocitus (already did a tier list for)
Larfleeze (already did a tier list for)
Calendar Man (already did a tier list for)
Martian Manhunter (already did a tier list for)
King Shark (already did a tier list for)
Sinestro (already did a tier list for)
John Constantine (already did a tier list for)
Alfred Pennyworth (already did a tier list for)
Solomon Grundy (already did a tier list for)
Black Manta (already did a tier list for)
Gorilla Grodd (already did a tier list for)
Brainiac (already did a tier list for)
Captain Cold (already did a tier list for)
Red Tornado (already did a tier list for)
Scarecrow (already did a tier list for)
Bizarro (already did a tier list for)
Lucifer Morningstar (already did a tier list for)
Two-Face (already did a tier list for)
The Creeper (already did a tier list for)
Cheetah (already did a tier list for)
Jonah Hex (already did a tier list for)
Mr. Mxyzptlk (already did a tier list for)
submitted by Insomniac616 to DeathBattleMatchups [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 06:17 ExquisiteFrancesca [I ate] Duck leg, red cabbage and cranberry sauce

[I ate] Duck leg, red cabbage and cranberry sauce submitted by ExquisiteFrancesca to food [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:59 JCThe-FinancialGuru I can say not a bad night🤑 3 plays $327

submitted by JCThe-FinancialGuru to fanduel [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:54 JaqueLacoque Light the beam

Light the beam submitted by JaqueLacoque to sportsbetting [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:48 EchoingCascade Red, green and yellow = STOP.

one-shot

An Imorac, grey skinned, four feet tall, wearing a white scientist's coat and a fake moustache was floating in front of a wall sized screen.
On it is a smiling Human couple having a picnic in the middle of a bright, sunny day.
Imorac: “Humans, they are our neighbours, coworkers and friends but how well do you know them?”
The image shift to a rainy day and the Humans eyes glow red ans their smiles turns sinister as explosions can be seen all around them.
Imorac: “While they may seem nice and kind on the outside they are completely different to you and I on the inside.”
A close up of a Human brain becomes visible from inside of the male's cranium.
Imorac: “All sentient beings have an inside voice, it's speak in an authoritative voice and when it says “you shouldn't” it is law.”
The Human brain's schematic has a series of question marks inside it.
Imorac: “In Humans on the other hand, the voice is a whisper and the tone is that of a suggestion “shouldn't you?” Is how they approach the universe. Common sense is a rare commodity in them, as such Sentient Resources are proposing the 3 colors initiative.”
An image of 3 vials of red, yellow and green colors appear on the screen.
Imorac: “If ever a Human outers the following sentences, or any variation with a similar meaning, you may administer one of the colored sedatives.”
A list appears on-screen.

When sober:
- I can do better than that.
- That is a dumb rule!
- Permits? I do not need any smelling permit!
- It is only illegal if we get caught.
- What is the worse that could happen?
- It can only kill me if I die.
- I will be fine.
- Maybe to an “insert race other than Human here” but it is okay if I do it.

When intoxicated:
- Hold my alcoholic beverage.
- I will boop the snoot!
- You know what is a really good idea?

If the Human is an engineer:
- I can get more power out of “insert device running at max capacity here.”
- They are not “laws” of physics, just guidelines.
- Well our superior did not say "no" per se.
- I will explain to our superior after.

If the Human is an intoxicated engineer:
- I have an idea.

Imorac: “In any of these cases you may use the sedatives, the yellow one will have them wake up a couple of hours later with the feeling of a bad “hangover”, the green one with the feeling of “having slept on your neck wrong” and the red one of “having been hit by a truck.” Do not worry, they leave no permanent damages.”
The image of the Human couple happily sleeping on the ground appears on the screen.
Imorac: “Remember, it is for their own good and everyone's safety.”
***
Conrad was the Human chief of Sentient Resources at the station and if one could die of shame they would be picking his remains off the floor, walls and ceiling.
He had watched the presentation with all senior members of the station.
Conrad: “... All in favor of going forward with the initiative?”
The vast majority of sentients present raised their hands, claws and pseudopodes.
Conrad: “Those against?”
A single hand rose, a Human hand.
Chief engineer Allison Alvarez stood up.
Alvarez: “While I understand the need to have such a policy...”
While she spoke the Aaen medical officer, Dances In Shadows furtively got up from her chair, took a red vial, put it in her injector and walked behind the engineer.
Alvarez, unaware of the Aaen's movement continued uninterrupted.
Alvarez: “I don't think that should apply to senior staff members.”
The Aaen chief of security, Bows To No King, read from his datapad.
Bows: “Are you saying that this is a “dumb rule” and “you will be fine” then?”
Alvarez: “Yes!”
The silence that followed was interrupted only when she realized what she had just said.
Alvarez: “Wait no, I meant...”
Conrad: “Doc!”
Alvarez: “Not the red one, not the red one!”
Dances In Shadows lunged towards Allison with a loud “Hiya!” and injected her with a dose of “hit by a truck red" on the neck.
Conrad sighed at the sleeping form of his fellow Human.
Conrad: “Alright, I say we call it an unanimous decision, the initiative goes live on Monday.”
End.
submitted by EchoingCascade to HFY [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:47 NoLogic101 (Offer) Updated List (Request) List, Offer

Codes must be redeemed immediately upon receiving. Thanks.
********** 4K UHD Titles **********
A Quiet Place - 4K - iTunes US
Alvin and the Chipmunks - Road Chip - 2015 - 4K - iTunes US - Ports to MA
Bumblebee - 4K - Vudu
Dawn of the Planet of apes - 4K - iTunes US - Ports to MA
E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial - 4K - MA
Everything Everywhere all at once - 4K - Vudu
Exodus Gods and Kings - 4K - iTunes US - (Ports to MA)
Fate of the furious (Extended Director Cut) - 2017 - 4K - MA
Fault in our Stars - 4K - iTunes US - Ports to MA
Godfather - Death of Michael Corleone - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
Hell or High Water - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
Home Alone - 4K - iTunes US (Ports to MA)
John Wick 3 - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
Jurassic Park - 4K - MA
Kingsman The Secret Service - 4K - iTunes US - Ports to MA
Knives Out - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
Night at the Museum - Secret of the Tomb - 2014 - 4K - iTunes US (Ports to MA)
Planes, Trains, and Automobiles - 4K - iTunes US
Pulp Fiction - 4K - iTunes US
Reds (1981) - 4K - iTunes US
Rocketman - 4K - Vudu
Saving Private Ryan - 4K - Vudu
Spectre - 4K - iTunes US
Terminator 2 : Judgement Day (1991) - 4K UHD - Vudu/ iTunes US
Top Gun (1986) - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
Total Recall (1990) - 4K UHD - Vudu/ iTunes US
War of the Worlds (Tom Cruise) - 4K - Vudu/ iTunes US
********** HD Titles **********
47 Meters Down - HD - Vudu
Baby Driver - HD - MA
Curse of Chucky (Unrated) - HD - MA
Daddy's Home 2 - HD - Vudu
Edward Scissorhands - HD - MA
Evil Dead (2013) - HD - MA
Fury - HD - MA
Hacksaw Ridge - HD - Vudu / GooglePlay US
Home - HD - MA
How to Train your Dragon 2 (2014) - HD - MA
Instant Family - HD - Vudu
It Follows - HD - Vudu
Jaws (2,3,The Revenge) 3 Movie Collection (1978, 1983, 1987) - HD - MA
John Wick 1 and 2 - HD - Vudu / GooglePlay US
John Wick 2 - HD - Vudu / GooglePlay US
Jurassic Park - HD - MA
Jurassic Park The Lost World - HD - MA
Jurassic Park 3 - HD - MA
Jurassic World - HD - MA
Jurassic World Fallen Kingdom - HD - MA
Killing them softly - HD - Vudu
Mission Impossible Collection (1,2,3,4,5,6) - HD - Vudu
Mummy (1999), Mummy Returns (2001), Mummy Tomb of Dragon Emperor (2008) - HD - MA
Godzilla Tokyo S.O.S and Godzilla Final Wars (2004,2005) - HD - MA
Pitch Perfect (2012) - HD - MA
Power Rangers (2017) - HD - Vudu / GooglePlay US
Rango - HD - Vudu
Rebirth of Mothra 1,2,3 (1996,1997,1998) - HD - MA
Robocop (2014) - HD - Vudu/GooglePlay US
Rush (2013) - HD - MA
Schindler's List (1993) - HD - MA
Skyfall - HD - Vudu/GooglePlay US
Spiderman Homecoming - HD - MA
Spiderman Far From Home - HD - MA
Spiderman No Way Home - HD - MA
Stallone First Blood - HD - Vudu / iTunes US
Star Trek into Darkness - HD - Vudu
Taken Collection (1,2,3) (Liam Neeson) - HD - MA
Ted (Unrated) 2012 - HD - MA
Ted (Unrated) and Ted 2 (Unrated) - HD - MA
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (2014) - HD - Vudu
The Amazing Spider-Man 2 - HD - MA
The Expendables 2 - HD - Vudu/GooglePlay US
The Hateful Eight - HD - Vudu / Google Play US
The Imitation Game - HD - Vudu
The Last Stand - HD - Vudu/GooglePlay US
Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets - HD - Vudu
Venom Let There be Carnage - HD - MA
Whiskey Tango Foxtrot - HD - Vudu
Wolverine (Unrated) 2013 - HD - MA
World War Z - HD - Vudu
********** US GooglePlay HD **********
Aladdin 1992
Aladdin 2019
Alien Covenant
Antman
Antman and the Wasp
Avengers Endgame
Avengers Infinity War
Beauty and the Beast
Big Friendly Giant (BFG)
Black Panther
Black Panther Wakanda Forever
Black Widow
Captain America First Avenger
Captain America Winter Soldier
Captain Marvel
Cars
Cars 3
Cruella
Dead Men Tell No Tales
Doctor Strange
Doctor Strange Multiverse
Finding Dory
Frozen
Greatest Showman
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2
Inside Out
Into The Woods
Iron Man
Iron Man 2
Jungle Cruise
Lone Ranger
Maleficent Mistress of Evil
Mary Poppins Returns
Monsters University
Mulan 2020
Planes
Ralph Breaks the Internet
Raya The Last Dragon
Rocky Horror Picture
Saving Mr.Banks
Shang Chi
Skyfall
Star Wars -
A New Hope, Force Awakens, Rise of Skywalker, Rogue One, Solo A Star Wars Story, The Last Jedi
Thor
Thor Dark World
Thor Ragnarok
Toy Story 1
Toy Story 2
Toy Story 3
Toy Story 4
West Side Story
********** SD Titles **********
21 Jump Street - SD - MA
A Dog's Way Home (2019) - SD - MA
Ghostbusters AfterLife (2021)- SD - MA
Hunger Games 4 Movie Collection - SD - Vudu
Pixels - SD - MA
Resident Evil Retribution 2012 - SD - MA
The Shallows - SD - MA
Zombieland Double Tap - SD - MA
********** TV Shows **********
Big Little Lies S01 - HD - GooglePlay US
Breaking Bad S05 and Final - HD - Vudu
Game of Thrones - Season 1 to 7 - HD - GooglePlay US
Outlander Season 1 Vol 1 - HD - Vudu
The Knick S01 and S02 - HD - GooglePlay US
True Blood S04 - HD - GooglePlay US
********** UK Google Play HD **********
2 Fast and Furious / 21 Jump Street / Amazing Spiderman 2 / Angels and Demons / Arthur Christmas / Baby Driver / Black Hawk Down / Blade Runner 2049 / Cloud Atlas / Concussion / Conjuring / Dawn of The Planet of the Apes / Deadpool / Deadpool 2 / Die Hard / Django Unchained / Elysium / Fast and Furious 1 / Fast and Furious 4 / Fast and Furious 6 / Fast Five Theatrical / Fifty Shades of Grey / Ghostbusters / Ghostbusters 2 / Ghostbusters Answer the Call / Hobbit The Unexpected Journey / Independence Day / Independence Day Resurgence / Inferno / Jason Bourne / Jumanji Welcome to the Jungle / Jurassic Park / Jurassic Park 3 / Jurassic Park Fallen Kingdom / Jurassic Park The Lost World / Labyrinth / Lego Batman / Lego Batman Super Heros United / Mike and Dave need Wedding Dates / Murder on the Orient Express / Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters / Pitch Perfect / Predator / Resident Evil Retribution / Secret Life of Pets / Smurfs 2 / Sully / Taxi Driver / Trolls / Turbo / Whiplash / Wolverine /
********** Canada Google Play HD **********
300 Rise of Empire / Alita / American Sniper / Batman vs Superman Ultimate edition / Batman vs Superman Theatrical edition / Birds of Prey / Chappie / Edge of Tomorrow / Godzilla / Goosebumps / Hang Over Part 3 / Into the Storm / Jaws / Mad Max Fury Road / Onward / Pacific Rim / Skyscraper / Spiderman into the Spiderverse / Snatched / X-Men Apocalypse (iTunes CA / GP CA)
submitted by NoLogic101 to uvtrade [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:31 weekendwater 4.5 Hr in ATL

I have a 4.5 hour layover in ATL Sunday after first leg of the trip being a red eye. Was hoping to get into one of the sky clubs to freshen up, recharge, get a good meal etc. I am only a Silver Medallion so was going to purchase a one time pass but I just found out they discontinued those. Is there any other way for me to gain access? Currently seated in main cabin for the flight but eligible for a complimentary upgrade (not sure if an upgrade to C+ or FC impacts my ability to get into SC).
submitted by weekendwater to delta [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:24 BvHauteville Finally beat the Gauntlet of Strength: Severance

Started off with a bad omen as I had much more trouble with King Kong than I usually do but the other bosses went down easily enough and according to plan, as much as Owl tried (and failed) to thwart my efforts, until I finally reached Inner Isshin - the bane of my existence for the past week or so.
Funnily enough, I started this run just to show my friend some of the bosses, not expecting to win considering I had yet to prevail over Inner Isshin even in a gauntlet of strength. However, despite still struggling more than I would have liked on his first phase but not to the extent I had wasted too many resources, I used the Red Lump + Fine Snow + Empowered Mortal Blade combo to quickly plow through his second phase while still having two resurrects in reserve left via Jizo statues, one more usage of the Ceremonial Tanto, and a fine quantity of healing items. I realized at that point that this would likely be the run where I'd finally do it.
Isshin still gave me hell with his semiautomatic Sengoku-era pistol and lightning bending but after redirecting his lightning twice with Sakura Dance, he was down low enough in posture and health that with another Red Lump + Rice Ball + Empowered Mortal Blade usage would have been enough to finish him. I probably could have beat him without it by switching to the Empowered Mortal Blade and just rushing him but hoped to land another lightning reversal if possible just to seal the deal. After he forced my last resurrect as a result of a mismanaged dodge against his spear, I resorted to the combo and got him to his last death blow with a a single back-to-back hit from Empowered Mortal Blade.
I might not have beaten him via the most honorable methods but that can wait for another time as a Shinobi should know the difference between honor and victory and for me, getting that Tengu costume for NG+ was the definition of victory.
submitted by BvHauteville to Sekiro [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:20 BluebirdConsistent60 H: FSA Uny/Ap/Wwr RA + adds W: USA RA Same Rolls.

My set is complete! But one of these things is not like the other. I've renamed, repainted, and I know it knows it doesnt belong 😅. Anyway, Looking to swap my Forest Right arm for Urban Right arm.
Also want to take some time to bring up the fact, I personally have only been playing 9 months. I don't care about past details and transgressions in the game. I play now, in the present. It's not like other stuff hasn't been rolled since those days.
But alas I digress, Here's what I have for potential adds. Dont want to, but such is trading. I will negotiate accordingly but am not going to go crazy to go from Forest Brown to Urban Blue.
Railways:
Gour-E-25LvC Jug-25ffr-15v TS-50c15r AA-50HC25LvC
Fixers AA-50H-25LvC AA-E-90 AA-25ffr-15fr AA-25ffr-15c TS-E-90 V-E-90 Fur-Aim-25LvC Fur-Rap-25LvC I-50crit-15v I-50HC-25lvc
Misc Pews/Melee I-40-40 chainsaw Med-E-25 LMG Fur-ffr-fr Tesla Rifle AA-50crit-50break .50cal
Armor(Non-Pa) Uny/1p/Cav Urban Right Leg Uny/25rad/Sent Urban RA Uny/25rad/50fall Wood LA OE/Cryo/75% Reduced Urban RA Noc/15limb/7% Explosion Urban RA Noc/AW7% Explosion Urban RL
PA Pieces OE-1Str-Cav Excavator RL TS-Sent-7% Explosion Excavator LL Noc/EDWwr T-45 LA
Apparel Deathclaw Mask Raven Mask Demon Mask UsA Mask BoS Jumpsuit Free Radicals Mask Hunters Longcoat Winter Jacket and Jeans+Wrapped Cap Clean Spacesuit+Clean Helmet Longshore + Yellow Slicker Hat
Plans Bottle Plush Cap & Bottle Cowboy Cutouts Circus Cage Trailer Classic Jack O Lantern Grim Reaper Vault Boy Cutout Large Ultracite Shard x2 Nuka Girl Rug x3 Poker set Red Truck Ceiling Light x4 Red Rocket Gas Station Lamp Sheriff's Hat Standing Gorilla x5 Sitting Gorilla x5 Snallygaster Plushie x2 Tv Aquarium Titan Plushie x2 Townsfolk Cutouts Vintage Watercooler x2 Wanamingo Plushie Wanted Posters Nuka Dark Overdrive Scaly Skin Serum Recipe
500 Bog3 Maps can come up with another 500 just have to pull from mule.
Can also buy up 500 badges worth of BP mods as well if a deal can be struck.
submitted by BluebirdConsistent60 to Market76 [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:13 livelifereal IPL 2023 Season Preview Part 4: Sunrisers Hyderabad

IPL 2023 Season Preview Part 4: Sunrisers Hyderabad
This 10-part series strives to be cricket's build-up to IPL 2023. The idea is to provide meticulous, team-wise previews that include every essential detail a fan needs to have.
Delhi CapitalsChennai Super KingsMumbai IndiansSunrisers HyderabadRoyal Challengers BangalorePunjab KingsRajasthan RoyalsLucknow Super GiantsKolkata Knight RidersGujarat Titans - (These links will be updated as every subsequent part is published)

Sunrisers Hyderabad

Owners: SUN TV Network
Home Ground: Rajiv Gandhi International Cricket Stadium, Hyderabad
Captain: Aiden Makram
Coaching Staff: (only major names)

Name Role
Brain Lara Head Coach
Simon Hemlot Assistant Coach
Muthiah Muralitharan Spin bowling and Strategic Coach
Dale Steyn Fast Bowling Coach
Ryan Cook Fielding Coach
Hemang Badani Batting Coach and Scout

Recap of 2022

Finishing Position: 8th
Played: 14, Won: 6, Lost: 8
2022 was a topsy-turvy ride for SRH, to say the least, and it began way before the actual tournament started. They were so gung-ho about building a team around Captain Williamson that they eventually let go off Rashid Khan: one of the best T20 players in the world. Then they allegedly ignored their pre-auction plans at the time of actual bidding. In the tournament, they started with two embarrassing losses but went on to win the next 5 matches convincingly. Next, they were delivered a finisher by Rashid Khan which kickstarted a 5-match losing streak. Though his picks (Abhishek, Markram, Tripathi) did well, Williamson himself struggled for form the entire season weighing the team down.

Top Run Getter Abhishek Sharma 426 runs
Top Wicket Taker Umran Malik 22 wickets

Preface to 2023


  • Talk of the Town
To Hyderabad fans, the upcoming season feels like a new sunrise. After five consecutive seasons of playoffs finish, the last two years felt like a nightmare to them. This time though, the chatter in the build up to the tournament is not of mismanagement, but of new beginnings. While it is - in many ways - a new look team altogether, there are three protagonists that are being talked about the most. First is Aiden Markram: the new captain who recently led SRH's sister team to triumph in the SA20. Second is the West Indies all time great Brain Lara: team's head coach this year and the mastermind under whose direction the new look side was assembled. Third is the much talked about English prodigy Harry Brook: for whom SRH broke a bank at the auctions. Them supported by a plethora of fresh domestic faces give the Orange ArmyTM the hopes of sunshine this season.

  • Jersey/Kit for the Season
Enthusiasts of cricket fashion breathed a collective sigh of relief as they saw that SRH are reverting to black trousers and won't be wearing the eyesore of orange pants they wore last year.

Mayank Agarwal, Umran Malik and Washington Sundar sporting the new jersey
Having said that, the word on the street is that their training jersey looks better than their playing kit.

These two are also probably talking about how good this training shirt looks

Abhishek Sharma during a training session

  • Fixtures for the Season
The Orange ArmyTM kicks off their season with an afternoon game against RR on Sunday, April 2nd. They play RR, MI, KKR, DC and LSG twice this season. Their only games against GT and CSK are away matches, while their only fixtures against the two "red and gold" teams - PBKS and RCB - are home games.

SRH's complete fixtures

  • Expected Conditions at Home Ground
The Rajiv Gandhi International Cricket stadium has always given memorable matches. From Sachin's 175 while chasing 350 against Australia in an ODI to Kohli giving it back to poor Kesrick Williams. From IPL's best bowling figures ever (Alzarri Joseph's 6-12) to the famous MI vs CSK final in 2019. This ground has a knack of producing memorable moments.
Though, conditions very much depends on what kind of wicket is offered on a given day, generally you'd find batting belters here. The pitches do tend to slow down towards the back of the season assisting a little bit spin. In the 7 home games SRH played here in 2019, they breached 200 three times. Funny enough, that's the same number of times teams were skittled out for a sub 120 score here that season.

Team for IPL 2023


  • Updates regarding injuries/unavailabilities

Player Name Likely Period of Absence Reason Replacements Announced
Aiden Markram First Match Centrally Contracted SA player; likely to be picked for Netherlands ODIs None
Mayank Markande Not Known Finger Injury; missed the Irani Cup due to it None
Marco Jansen First Match Centrally Contracted SA player; likely to be picked for Netherlands ODIs None
T Natarajan Not Known Has been out of action since October 2022 due to injury None
Heinrich Klassen First Match Centrally Contracted SA player; likely to be picked for Netherlands ODIs None
Note: Replacements can only be announced for players who will be missing the entire season.


  • Updated Squad
Aiden Markram✈️ (captain), Bhuvneshwar Kumar, Mayank Agarwal, Washington Sundar, Rahul Tripathi, Harry Brook✈️, Umran Malik, Heinrich Klaasen✈️, Anmolpreet Singh, Adil Rashid✈️, Akeal Hosein✈️, Upendra Yadav, Sanvir Singh, Samarth Vyas, Vivrant Sharma, Mayank Markande, Abdul Samad, Glenn Phillips✈️, Abhishek Sharma, Marco Jansen✈️, Fazalhaq Farooqi✈️, Kartik Tyagi, T Natarajan, Nitish Kumar Reddy, Mayank Dagar.

Likely First Choice XI: 1. Abhishek Sharma 2. Mayank Agrawal 3. Rahul Tripathi 4. Aiden Markram✈️ (c) 5. Harry Brook✈️ 6. Heinrich Klassen✈️ (wk) 7.Washington Sundar 8. Adil Rashid✈️ 9. Bhuvneshwar Kumar 10. Umran Malik 11. Kartik Tyagi/T Natarajan IP Options: Sanvir Singh, Abdul Samad, Vivrant Sharma(Note: Impact player cannot be an overseas player if there are already 4 overseas players in the playing XI)


  • Major Strengths
(i) A well-balanced squad: On paper, SRH seem to have all bases covered. A decent set of openers, a drool-worthy middle order, able finishers and a formidable bowling attack - they seem to check all boxes. Moreover, the crop they've garnered this year has good mix of youth and experience. They seemed to have made prudent bids for each role rather than splurging their purse on a couple of names with big reputation.
(ii) Variety and experience in bowling: A certified IPL legend (Bhuvneshwar Kumar); An express pace speedster (Umran), A 2-metre left armer who can swing it (Jansen), miserly finger spinners (Sundar & Akeal), wily ol' leggie (Rashid) and a more than decent support cast (Tyagi, Farooqi, Natarajan, Markande and others). What more do you want?

(iii)The engine in the middle: The stand out feature that the fans are, perhaps, most thrilled about is the middle order. Tripathi, Markram, Brook and Klassen form a very potent line up and each of those men have individually grown leaps and bounds in stature in the last one year. Furthermore, SRH have Philips, Samad and couple other impressive local cricketers as backups. And in case you feel the lack of a left hander among these is an issue, remember Sundar can be floated in the order as per convenience.

  • Weaknesses
(i) The Injury Chronicles: Mayank Markande missed the Irani Cup due to a finger injury, while Natarajan has been out of action since October 2022. Although, there are no other major reports of injuries from the camp, the dubious track record of Tyagi, Bhuvneshwar, Philips and Sundar is well known. Fans would hope that the players can stay fit and last the season so that SRH's chances stay ripe.
(ii) Undersupply of characters proven in the IPL: As impressive as Umran, Abhishek and Markram were last year, in all fairness, they've all had just one good season in the IPL. Klassen, Rashid and Philips have a combined IPL experience of only 11 matches in which their numbers are appalling. While Brook has been setting the world on fire, he's yet to play a match in India. Adjusting to conditions is one thing, coping with the cutthroat pressure the IPL brings is another challenge these blokes will have to overcome.

Game Plan: Possible Punts


  • Starting Stutters
The upcoming ODIs against Netherlands are a must win for South Africa with regards to qualifications for the 2023 World Cup. Having already been shocked by Netherlands last year, SA don't want to take any chances and have hence decided to go with a full strength squad. This means Jansen, Klassen and captain Markram won't be available for the Orange ArmyTM's opening fixture. While it's just one game, a bad start can put you in a bit of rut. In a tournament where everybody talks of "momentum", SRH would want other players to stand up and get them off to a winning start. Upendra Yadav and Glenn Philips would be likely to take the place of the absentees while the toss up for captaincy could be between Bhuvneshwar Kumar and Mayank Agarwal.

  • Mayank and other local lads
By this time last year, Mayank Agarwal was on the top of the world. He was a regular in the Test side and was being paid ₹14 crore to captain an IPL team. But he has come tumbling down a few steps. No more in the Indian team, his franchise released him and though SRH picked him up, he's getting less than 60% of his last year's salary. He'd have a point to prove.
So would Anmolpreet Singh who was with the Mumbai Indians since 2019 but got only 3 matches in 4 years. Other than them, the franchise also picked a bunch of rookie domestic players whom they would want to put their long term investment in. Vivrant Sharma: their latest acquisition from J&K; Sanvir Singh: Punjab finisher who strikes at 186 in T20s and Samarth Vyas, who this season became just the fifth batter to score a double century in the Vijay Hazare Trophy, would be the favourites.

  • The Klassen Question
Wicketkeeper-batter Heinrich Klassen has been in red hot form. Whilst his brisk, match-winning hundred against WI made headlines, it didn't come out of the blue. Before this, Klassen had a stellar season of SA20 amassing 350+ runs at an average of 60 and strike rate of 164. In his last match of the season Klassen scored a 43-ball century and helped his team post a score of 254 in 20 overs.
With Tripathi, Markram and Brook/Philips in the side, Klassen is likely to be given the finisher's role batting at 6: which he has been successful with on a few occasions in the past. However, Klassen was regularly batting at 3 in the SA20. Given the kind of impact he can have and Markram and Brook's credibility in playing the finisher's role, SRH could - at some point in the tournament - promote Klassen up the order and ask him to have a whack. Last time a franchise promoted a keeper-batter-finisher up top, it became a milestone moment.

Share this with SRH fans you know and feel free to express your thoughts in the comments. Stay Tuned for Part 5: Rajasthan Royals (RCB Preview has been pushed back since their jersey launch is happening on 26th March)
Delhi CapitalsChennai Super KingsMumbai IndiansSunrisers HyderabadRoyal Challengers BangalorePunjab KingsRajasthan RoyalsLucknow Super GiantsKolkata Knight RidersGujarat Titans - (These links will be updated as every subsequent part is published)
submitted by livelifereal to Cricket [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 05:04 username2468_memes updated my topster. thoughts?

updated my topster. thoughts? submitted by username2468_memes to Topster [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:54 Alpha-Sierra-Charlie Contractors 14.13 - Pour one out for the fallen

First, Previous

Jethriss

Jethriss giggled and tried to line the pitcher up with her mug up for a refill, but was having a hard time. She'd put down more than her fair share of the local ale, which Meatball had dubbed "Good" for some reason, even though it was only "okay", and she was struggling a little bit. Actually, she was drunk off her ass. "The boys", as she thought of them, had spent days hiding in the woods, then spent all of yesterday assaulting and then securing and scouring the last stronghold of the Grekthitch Cartel. Then they spent most of today asleep, and now they were all at the bar partying as hard as they possibly could to blow off the steam. Rosco, sitting to her right in the booth against the back wall, noticed her struggle and took the pitcher away and filled her mug all the way up to the top.
"You ass!" she giggled.
He grinned "I expect you to work too!"
"Every time that ship flies in atmosphere I end up with work! It's a spaceship, not an aircraft."
"Oh, boo hoo!"
Jethriss worked her beak into the mug and slurped and spilled enough beer out to safely pick it up, and listened to Meatball loudly telling about the time they'd raided some cartel growing operation and how Wiggles had ended up literally biting a skink's head off because he couldn't reload fast enough, and not realizing he'd done it unti the head fell out of his mouth and landed on his feet. When the laughter subsided Wiggles added that he'd had to ride back to their compound in the cargo bed of a truck, in the rain, because he'd ended up so dirty, then recounted a fight in this very bar where Meatball had gently slapped an awrok unconscious, and then made up a hilarious and ludicrous story about how afterward Meatball had received vigorous sexual gratification from the same awrok. Meatball had just grinned and explained that he'd only done so out of desperation, since Wiggles had never been a satisfying lover in the first place. There were more drunken guffaws, then Gratorf and Attrull recounted the time they'd had to track down and apprehend a peasant admirer who had managed to infiltrate the harem of their previous employer, the Lady Elissa of House Ganthul. The mention of her name caused much jeering, the bitch had nearly gotten the boys killed, but the story was hilarious. Attrull had to go undercover as a new concubine to find the guy, and had nearly been roped into fucking his boss (who of course, was too self-centered to recognize a member of her own security detail), and had ended up causing a near stamped right in her pleasure chamber when he tased the imposter before he could violate the Lady.
They drank and smoked, told stories and laughed. Skeethrow told about how he'd joined Rosco's group. Years ago, not long after Jethriss had joined Rosco, he'd been in a pirate crew and they'd booked passage on a bulk freighter, intending to hijack it. Well, things kicked off and they were making a move to secure engineering, and they got into a firefight with what they thought was security. Turns out, it was another group of pirates that Rosco had fallen in with who were also planning to hijack the ship! By the time both sides realized what was going on, it was just Skeethrow and two other members of his team left, and while everyone was reloading he heard this human yell out "Hey! You fellas want a job? We just had a few positions open up!"
This was followed by cheers and a toast to Rosco, who laughed, then Rex told a story about the time they'd been janissaries for the Gunchow Combine, and one of the nobles who had singled their regiment out for a suicide mission had mysteriously found himself hospitalized with severe food poising and missed a key planning meeting because someone (he said, pointing his mug at Rosco) had managed to somehow contaminate his food with fecal matter.
The table roared with laughter. Normally when the Gallowglasses got this rambunctious the bar tended to empty out a little, not that the owner minded given that they drank more than enough to compensate, but it stayed busy tonight. Jethriss didn't really pay much heed to the group of skinks that had walked in and stayed by the bar up front, other than the fact that Rosco seemed to be paying more than passing attention to them.
She opened her beak to tell the story about the time Rex had to up act like a Orrick chieftan's pet in order to steal his treasure horde, but it turned into a surprised squawk when Rosco put his hand on top of her head and harshly jammed her under the table.
The sound of gunfire and bullet impacts filled the air. Some of the impacts sounded... wet.
The table flipped as the Gallowglasses jumped up and... she didn't know what they were doing. She wasn't much use in interpersonal violence, she was no coward, she was just a pilot. She stayed on the floor, curled up in a ball, as the seconds dragged by and the shooting subsided. She remembered she had a concealed pistol and drew it, before looking around the edge of the table.
Meatball and Thriktikt had picked up rifles from somewhere and were shooting out of a nearby window into the street, Charge was in the doorway firing a pistol while his left arm dangled, damaged.
Wiggles was crawling toward the door, dragging a leg that bent the wrong way behind him, and added his own pistol fire once he got there.
Keelath was sitting against a wall, applying a tourniquet to his leg. He was covered in blood.
Trilth and Trakkow were holding a third skink down and doing... something first aid related while he thrashed and screamed.
Rex was yelling into his radio. Jethriss couldn't understand his words.
Gratorf was lying on his back, bulging eyes staring at the ceiling. She ran over to him and rolled him over to bandage the wound that had produced a small puddle of blood under his head, and his scrambled brains fell out as his skull fell apart. She turned her head and vomited.
She saw a skink bandaging a nasty scalp wound on Frank Tippery, and Robert Johnson walking between fallen skinks, shooting some of them in the head.
Rosco was on his knees, his right forearm broken open halfway down from the elbow, chewed meat and jagged bone poking out and leaking blood, right hand flopping as he tried to use it to put a meatpatch on Skeethrow's chest. He was yelling, telling Skeethrow not to go anywhere. Skeethrow's face and head were covered in the blood that poured and sprayed from his mouth with every cough, ragged chunks of pink mixed in with the red. She pulled a tourniquet out of her cargo pocket and walked over in a daze. Skeethrow spasmed again and went still, she hadn't noticed his strained gurgling breath against the background din until it stopped. Rosco howled and shoved a broken stool under Skeethrow's feet, and tried to start chest compressions but his broken arm confounded him. He shoved Jethriss away when she tried to slip the tourniquet over his arm, until eventually Rex got done on the radio and between the two of them got the thing on and the old rooster's bleeding stopped.
The gunfire in the bar had stopped, but elsewhere in the city, fighting was still raging.
submitted by Alpha-Sierra-Charlie to HFY [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:52 Fabulous_Point8748 Undiagnosed Disease

Currently as I’m writing this, I’ve had very severe symptoms which interfere with my day-to-day life. My symptoms have been on-going now for several months and have not improved at all. Oddly enough, I had symptoms appear at the end of October and then go away after a couple of weeks that match what I’m currently experiencing. Prior to experiencing my symptoms in October, I’ve had a number of other symptoms appear that I think are related, but I can’t verify if they are or not.
Cognitive Issues
Currently the symptom I’m experiencing everyday is a cognitive disorder. It’s hard to explain exactly, but it feels as if I haven’t slept for a week or that I'm buzzed. The symptoms are typically worse in the morning and night. If I’m working in the middle of the day I don’t experience this issue (as much). The symptom also gets worse if I do any sort of physical activity like walking my dog, hiking, or mountain biking. That being said, I do sometimes notice I feel better after doing physical activity. Sometimes the cognitive issue is also paired with odd head sensations like head pressure that I notice around my ears and the back of my head. Sometimes I’ll also have a tingling feeling that happens on the sides of my head near my ears. In addition to the tingling sometimes I’ll have an odd aching sensation on the top of my head near the vertex (the coronal suture) and back of my head near where the occipital bone and parietal bone meet. The aching sensation almost feels like my skull is about to split open. I’ve also experience increased head pressure and a pulsing sensation on my head sometimes when my cognitive issues are at their worst. Less commonly, I’ll also have issues with vertigo and balance. Specifically, if I’m walking I’ll feel like my balance is off and I’ll lean to one side- usually my left side. I’ve had on-going issues with tinnitus as well. It’s not persistent, but it seems to happen most often at night. I experience it almost everyday. Sometimes I'll lose my hearing temporarily as well and it'll come back after about a minute. Lastly, my left ear will sometimes feel clogged and nothing I do seems to relieve the pressure. My cognitive issues also seem to be much worse after taking a hot shower. Specifically I’ll have increased head pressure and have an increased jet lag/hangover feeling.
Chest Pain
The second most common issue that I’ve experienced is chest pain. The chest pain I have manifests in different ways, but usually it’s an aching sensation that I notice on my clavicle head and extends to the sternocostal head slightly and it occurs on both sides of my chest. Sometimes the pain is also a burning sensation. I’ve also had pain that occurs in my sternum that’s a sharp pain. Most often these pains occur at night or in the evening.
Heart
My heart related issues seem to happen less often, but have started becoming more frequent as of late. The most common issues that I experience is heart palpations. Commonly it manifests with either a racing heart, the feeling I skipped a beat, or a fluttering feeling. I experience these symptoms most often at night and especially while I’m sleeping. I’ve had a few incidents where I’ll wake up in the middle of the night with my heart racing. I wear an Apple Watch SE most of the time now since my symptoms started and I’ve noticed my pulse is as high as 96 when I wake up in the middle of the night with my heart racing. I don’t have nightmares- I can’t honestly the last time I remember having a nightmare in fact. My pulse has recently been pretty high when I'm sleeping as well. Usually it's between 40 - 50, but recently it's been between 50 - 70.
Another issue I used to have, but has sense improved greatly since I cut down dramatically on caffeine and stopped eating late at night is heart burn.
Rashes
Another odd symptom that I’ve started having is red rashes that manifest on my chest, stomach, arms, or legs. The rashes are usually a solid red color or are spotty and sometimes cover a large area or a very small specific area. I’ve had a very large chest rash that covered the entirety of my chest and other times I’ve had small rashes on my legs that look like a small line.
Eyes
Another very common issue for me is bloodshot eyes. I will usually wake up in the morning with my eyes completely bloodshot. The only thing that seems to relieve it is eye drops which I use at most once a day. I will strangely also sometime have very red and visible veins that extend from my pupil to the tear duck. Near my pupil I’ll have a spot that can be either very red or slightly pink. I usually know I’ve having this issue because my eye will burn and begin to water. Sometimes I wake up with this issue and other times it will come and go throughout the day. I usually notice it during the middle of the day while I’m working on my computer.
Veins
I really don’t know if this is a cause for concern or not or if it’s even related, but I’ve noticed my veins on my arms and hands are more visible than they've ever been. They’re a very deep blue color and they’re most pronounced in the morning, after I take a shower, or do any sort of physical activity.
Muscle Mass/Weight Loss
I’ve noticed that since of February last year to today, I’ve lost quite a bit of weight. Last February I weighed approximately 138 and now I weigh about 130. I haven’t had any significant changes in my diet other than not eating late at night. I attribute most of my weight loss to muscle loss which I notice physically because I’m not able to lift as much weight as I use to be able to. I use to take creatine monohydrate regularly which I know will increase muscle mass and weight so I’m sure this is part of the reason I’m losing weight, however, even after not taking creatine for several months I’ve still struggled to keep on weight and muscle mass. Since my symptoms began I’ve been diligently tracking my diet and on average I eat approximately 2,400 - 3,000 calories per day.
Muscle Twitching
This is a symptom I’ve had for at least a year now. Typically I’ll notice it in my arm near the extensor carpi radials longus. What will happen is an uncontrollable twitching sensation that will be visible if I happen to look at it. This happens on both arms around the same area. I’ll also have muscle twitching as well in my ankles sometimes, but it’s not very frequent. I've had it in my face as well on my eyes and lips. Occasionally I’ll also have restless legs when I’m sleeping, but this does not happen often.
Uncontrollable Teeth Chattering
One strange event that I had before was while I was sitting on the couch. I was feeling otherwise normal, but my teeth began to chatter uncontrollably for no apparent reason. I didn't feel cold either.
Hands
An issue that I’ve had for many years now is cold hands. Sometimes they’re purplish in color, very pale or very red. My hands will become cold for no apparent reason. They’re not cold 24/7 but at least several hours of the day. A specific problem that I have with my left-hand is that it will often be weak, specifically it’s difficult to pick things up with my left hand. Also when I type on my computer I’ll frequently have pain in my wrist associated with it. My pinky and ring finger also sometimes go numb especially if I bend my arm for a long period of time.
Arms
As I mentioned above, I frequently will have muscle twitching in my arms. Another thing I’ve noticed is that while I’ve had my symptoms, I’ve had a few nights where I’ll wake up and my arm is totally numb. Lately for the last few weeks my left arm has felt heavy and perhaps slightly numb. It seems to happen on the outward facing side of my arm specifically.
Face
An on-going issue that I’ve had for years is facial flushing. It seems to have gotten worse since my symptoms began. It feels like I have a fever, despite taking my temperature and not having one. I’ll typically notice the flushing mostly on my nose and it will extend to my cheeks. Sometimes when I get facial flushing I’ll have congestion as well. I noticed I’ll frequently have dark circles under my eyes as well. I’ve had this issue for quite a while now, but it’s become even more pronounced lately.
Feet
My feet are also frequently cold. I’ve noticed my toes often are purple. My big toe on my right foot also has dry skin. This has been an on-going issue for years. Recently my left heel went completely numb. I’ve since gotten feeling back but it lasted for a few days.
Ankles
I’ll frequently have heaviness in my ankles like they’re swelling, but they don’t appear to be visibly swollen at all. It’s been an on and off experience that can sometimes last for days at a time. One night my left ankle felt extremely swollen and painful. The veins in my legs were pulsating as well.
Thighs
I haven’t had much thigh pain, but occasionally I’ll get the same muscle twitching in my thigh or aching pain in my quadricep or my abductors.
Privates
This is one of the strangest symptoms I’ve had. Sometimes I’ll have issues where I’ll have pressure near my prostate (I think). It makes me feel like I need to urinate even though I don’t have to. Also have I finish urinating sometimes I’ll have a pain in my privates like I just passed a kidney stone which I definitely don't have.
Stomach
When I started having my symptoms I would typically have pain in areas like left flank above my left hip. It was either an aching pain or a sharp pain. I haven’t had that pain recently. Another pain that I’ve had frequently (maybe a few days per week) is located on my top left abdominal muscle.
Back
I’ve had a dull aching pain in my upper back for quite some time that I attributed to my sedentary lifestyle, but lately it’s gotten a lot worse to the point where it’s very painful. It’s still an aching pain but it’s much more severe. It's since gotten better.
Ribs
I don’t usually have rib pain, but when I do it’s an aching pain that’s tender to the touch and lasts a few days.
Breathing
I haven’t had any issues feeling out of breath at all even when I had Covid.
Nausea
Since December I’ve had nausea maybe 5 or 6 times total and I didn’t start having symptoms of it until January. It seems like it’s gotten more frequently lately. I haven’t vomited, but I have the feeling like I might.
Bad habits
I had a bad habit of drinking a lot of caffeine per day. For at least a couple of years I think it was higher than 600mgs per day. I cut down to 600mgs per day prior to having my symptoms, but I’ve slowly gotten down to having 100mgs of caffeine a day or none at all. I also used to eat at night shortly before going to bed which gave me heart burn and caused me to have sleep issues. I also used to drink lots of diet drinks like diet sodas. I’ve since almost entirely cut out aspartame from my diet except I might have a diet soda a couple times per month. I think I also had a lot of sodium in my diet from the vegetarian meat substitutes and canned foods I was eating. I also drank a lot of water per day. Probably at least a gallon.
Past events
In addition to the other strange past events I’ve had like uncontrollable teeth chattering. I’ve had a few other strange symptoms that have come and go. One such event I had was in July or September while I was mountain biking. I was biking up a hill but I didn’t feel like I was pushing my self exceptionally hard. When I got up to the top of the hill I got very lightheaded and had the same jet lag/hangover feeling I’m experiencing currently. The same happened in November shortly after I got over my symptoms in October. I had the same lightheaded feeling and cold sweats I experienced before while mountain biking. Also a few months back I had the same experience but while walking on the treadmill. I began having sudden cold sweats without explanation, but I didn’t feel light headed at all. Another time I was taking my dog
Sleep
I’ve mentioned that I’ll frequently wake up with my heart racing, but I also sometimes wake up suddenly without any explanation. Sometimes I’ll wake up because my back is in pain and I have to transition to my side or vice-versa. I’ve tried both firmer and softer mattresses and neither seem to make a difference.
Supplements
Melatonin at night to help with sleep
Cannabis sleep capsules
Gingko biloba to help with cognitive issues
Creatine (cut out since symptoms began)
Pre-workouts like amino energy or L-Arginine (stopped taking these when my symptoms began)
Energy drinks like Reign, Alani Nu, and Ghost that have 300mgs of caffeine and high B vitamins and taurine
Covid
I had Covid in mid-November that I tested negative for on Black Friday. It wasn’t severe- mostly cold like symptoms with a very bad headache and head pressure. I thin Covid probably contributed to my current condition, but I’m not sure if it’s the cause of my issues considering my major symptoms began before I got Covid in October.

Tests Done:
UTI - negative
PSA - waiting on test
Urinalysis - normal
CBC - normal
JAK2 - negative
EPO - normal
CRP - near 0
Sedimentation rate- near 0 / 2 march
Creatinine - low 7.3
High co2 in metabolic tests
NT pro BNP - 26
Troponin - 5
Lipase - normal
Ferritin - normal
Iron - normal
Folate - normal
Cortisol - normal
T4 - normal
Free T4 - normal
T3 Uptake - normal
Free T3 - normal
Creatine Kinase - normal
TSH- high in October but tested twice and was normal high again in March
Immuglobulin - normal
A1C - normal
Lyme - negative
Kidney stones - negative
CT scan on head - normal
Whole body MRI - normal except for a minor bulging disc in my lower spine
HIV - negative
ANA - negative
Sleep apnea- negative
Comprehensive Metabolic Panel - normal except slightly low creatinine, slightly high co2, and high albumin on very test
Liver panel - normal except high albumin and low globulin sometimes. High a/g ratio- 3.5
EKG- low resting pulse rate (53 - 56) and borderline abnormal T-wave. Last test I did I had a left axis deviation (-32 degrees).
Micronutrient test - borderline low vitamin D, B12 ok, high selenium, high zinc, high magnesium

Veins
Eye
Rash
Facial Flush
submitted by Fabulous_Point8748 to DiagnoseMe [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:48 BitchBass Meet The Professor, my red-clawed crab living in a brackish setup with one single silverlined mudskipper for a year now

Meet The Professor, my red-clawed crab living in a brackish setup with one single silverlined mudskipper for a year now submitted by BitchBass to bizzariums [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:36 PappyStrangeLife The Man from Capernaum

God said to Abraham, "Kill me a son"
Abe say, "Man, you must be puttin' me on"
God say, "No, " Abe say, "What?"
God say, "You can do what you want Abe, but
Next time you see me comin', you better run"
Abe said, "Where do you want this killin' done?"
God said, "Out on Highway 61"
The radio, a martyr’s relic from a bygone era, sounded half as faded as I was.
I reeked of vodka and middy weed. I didn’t care. This lonely stretch of highway belonged to no one as far as I was concerned, and you gambled taking the curves in the dark.
It was your fault if you choose to gamble with me. Least, that’s the way I saw it.
Texas felt so far away.
Well, Cowboy Dan's a major player in the cowboy scene
He goes to the reservation, drinks and gets mean
And he's gonna start a war
He's gonna start a warrrrrr
And he hops in his pickup
Puts his pedal to the floor
And says, "I got mine
But I want more"
Because Cowboy Dan's a major player in the cowboy scene
He goes to the reservation, drinks and gets mean
He goes to the desert, fires his rifle in the sky
And says, "God, if I have to die, you will have to die"
I hacked up what felt like part of a lung. My hand was stained, the oxidized rust of old blood mixed with a fresh coat of red, a fresco that highlighted a life poorly lived.
Wait.
What happened to Bob Dylan?
Or was it Johnny Cash?
Wasn’t I just listening…
Gaps in time. I prayed I hadn’t taken the ketamine.
That was for later.
If you want proof time is just a strongly worded opinion, just slip into a k-hole.
That was for later.
My eyelids felt heavy.
There were no stars.
Endless pines, only shadowy outlines in the dark, still cover for the night’s starving predators, were all I could make out.
I just guessed at where the road kinked and turned and straightened.
I was playing a game with God, and I wanted to lose.
I wanted us all to lose.
“Dance, Dance to the radio
While the, Devil takes control,
Dance, Dance to the radio,
While the, Devil takes control…”
The warm hug of oblivion, a feeling like endless cookies and Saturday morning cartoons, began slipping its infinite arms around me.
Come and See, and I saw.
It was still the witching hour when I woke with a startled gasp. I could feel the claws of need, withdrawal, dragging up my arms, burrowing into my skin, making the back of my eyeballs vibrate.
Every day the need grew stronger, and every day, I killed off a little bit more of me.
One is too many, and a thousand is never enough.
I was in a ditch.
This wasn’t new or news. I tended to wake up in a lot of ditches. Beats Motel 6. Fewer roaches and you could smoke in every room.
My truck wouldn’t start.
Not even the wheezing gasps of a machine trying to cling to artificial life. Just a click and utter silence.
The battery couldn’t be dead. I checked my watch.
5:55 A.M.
I figured I’d tried to hit the eternal snooze button around 3 A.M. It had only been a few hours. Battery should be fine.
A cursory inspection showed no external damage. No blown tires, no misbegotten wires or missing spark plugs. Hell, it seemed like I’d just slowly cruised into this dark little corner of the universe.
It was as though the truck just gave up the ghost and said, "I’m done." The thirsty horse dropping to the ground in an endless desert, done with the death march.
I bear crawled up the small ravine and onto the highway.
A generous term for a lonely road in whatever the Hell backwater burg America had shit out here.
All I could see were outlines in the dark.
Fitting, I thought.
And then an explosion stole my vision.
Let there be light.
And there was.
And it was good.
Especially good.
Because it was a bar.
A ramshackle of a spot, dive joint meets biker meth hangout, from the looks of it, and it was just powering up.
Shit, if you couldn’t drink on Sunday morning, were we really free? Were we really God’s children at all?
I started ambling toward the light, my eyes adjusting to the deep gloom.
“The Man from Capernaum.”
Hell of a name for a spot in the middle of BFE.
Hell of a name.
Hell.
Hell, I needed a drink.
My watch read 6 a.m. but it was 5 o’clock somewhere, and this place had electricity buzzing it had to pay for and didn’t much strike me as the sort of establishment that probably saw the law as anything more than a nuisance.
I sauntered up to the door, my black boots clicking loudly against the rotten wooden porch.
Into the lion’s den we go.
Unsurprisingly, it was empty as a church on Friday night. Why kill the Son if you can’t have the sin, after all?
But it was unlocked and music was softly crooning from somewhere.
“As I went down in the river to pray
Studying about that Good Ol’ Way
And who shall wear the robe and crown
Good Lord, show me the way”
Fantastic. No bartender and proselyting in a shit joint. That’s just what my migraine and itchy skin called for.
I considered hopping the bar and grabbing a bottle of Jack Daniel’s, but this struck me as a place where your head might become acquainted with a shotgun right quick and nobody would kick up much fuss.
I was going out, a lamb among wolves, but on my terms. I’d had enough violence. I wanted to feel the void swallow me whole, not feel a hole swallow my head.
Plopping down on an empty stool, I risked lighting up a smoke. Certainly they wouldn’t get bent out of shape over a cowboy killer or two.
And shit, who was there to kick up dirt anyway? A ghost town without the spirits, save the ones just behind the bar and out of reach.
The tantalizing fruit in the garden.
God, I need a cold one, now.
“Till armageddon no shalam, no shalom
Then the Father Hen will call His chickens home
The wise man will bow down before the throne
And at His feet they'll cast their golden crowns
When The Man comes around”
The hairs on my arm stood up.
That wasn’t the gentle croon of some A.M. gospel channel. That was someone singin’ in the bar.
In the furthest stool at the left end of the bar, a wild looking man sat, intermittently taking greedy gulps of amber beer and singing loudly, his other arm flailing frenetically as though conducting an unseen orchestra.
Ah, good, a ninja crackhead. That’s just what I need.
He looked over at me and I leapt from my chair and damn near outta my boots.
Ancient as the hills, this man looked like he’d just come down the mountain from communing with the darkness itself.
God damn.
A wild, grey, patchy beard splayed out in every direction, as though the hair itself was trying to escape the vessel that grew it.
The crown of his head was bald but the rest was shaggy white hair, matted in some places, errantly sticking up in others, as though it couldn’t choose between electrocution and submission.
He wore what looked like a white robe, but it was stained with all manner of mess. Copper, brown, yellow, black. Blood, shit, piss, and Heaven only knows what. A fetid robe of many colors.
Tattered, rudimentary sandals held in dirty feet with long, yellowed toenails.
The man reeked worse than sulfur. Worse than death. It was like the pungent stank of the human stain clung to him with reckless abandon.
He was chubby and withered and maddened.
But none of that held a penny to his eyes.
Orbs of the purest white, ringed with seared, blackened flesh around the edges.
Nothing but endless, empty white that somehow felt like it saw nothing but what we all couldn’t see. Nothing of this world but everything we hide in it. Our lies, the horrors behind the masks, what we do in the dark, this tattered, horrible amalgam we have the audacity to still call “a soul.”
Fuck this.
I went to run but found I had no will to do so.
My boots had become one with the earth, like the leather was finally gonna join the cattle that had to die for me to feel like a man.
A crash of thunder stole my hearing, a tiny whirlwind began lifting and smashing bottles from behind the bar.
The seals of the bottles came open, spraying spirits everywhere.
The bar was alight with white fire and a light blasted through the bar that would embarrass the Sun.
Then all was silent and still.
“Nice hooves,” the man said in a velvety baritone.
I looked down at my black boots and back up at him.
There is probably a drug cocktail somewhere in existence where, if mixed properly and taken with utter scientific precision, probably unlocks the gates to Heaven in the human consciousness.
I think I might have found the one’s that unlocked Hell’s.
The man wore a wide, warm grin. Authentic and inviting, the jovial visage of every TV grandfather. Creature comfort. He no longer looked like a raving maniac.
Far from it.
The man was now young, maybe late 20’s.
Golden, feathered locks elegantly curved just behind his ears.
A black cardigan, dark jeans, and new Grecian sandals graced a well-kept temple, a body of with seemingly perfect porcelain skin.
Sapphire blue eyes, pools of painful beauty, the kind that feels like a knife twisting your gut, looked at me with compassion.
I could smell lilac and some spice that seemed reminiscent of a world long gone by but made me what want to curl up with a blanket and read a good book by the fire wafted my way.
A single, marred tattoo of a small cross ran down the index finger of his left hand.
The man sat down and said, “why don’t you and them hooves join me, Pappy?”
I go by a lot of names to keep myself safe in this shithole world, but I hadn’t gone by my real name since I beat a kid black and blue in elementary school for mocking me for it and my daddy had told me he was proud of me. Put a cigarette out on the back of my neck later that same night after a few too many for causing trouble.
The duality of man or whatever the Hell the academics prattle on about, I guess.
“They’re boots,” I snarled, playing at bravery, bluffing like I did every day of this wasted life, hopin’ it might but him back on his heels.
I didn’t know if I was messing with some damned creature not of this world or was just higher than a kite and seeing nonsense. While the latter seemed far more likely, I wanted to prepare for the former.
“Sure,” he said kindly, “sure.”
I sat down on the tattered stool.
“Where’s the bartender? And how the Hell do you know my name?”
“Calm down, son. You look like you could use a drink of the old blood. Sure beats those poisons you keep sticking in that body we gave ya.”
A wine glass appeared before each of us, filled to the brim. The man, or whatever it was, sipped away, humming some forgotten hymnal.
“I ain’t much of a vino fan. Got any Irish whisky?”
He lifted his glass as though to toast me and said “Sure. And you certainly will need that later. For now, the grapes of wrath, as it were.” A soft chuckle left his lips.
I sipped the wine. No sense bucking the bull when you don’t know how big or angry it really is.
It tasted like nothing I had ever had before. An indescribable, wicked deliciousness.
It warmed me up and filled me with light and hope and covered up all the dark holes that had punched through me by others.
Even plugged the ones I’d punched myself.
“We?”
The man took a small sip. “Sorry?”
“You said ‘the body *we* gave ya. *We*.”
It was only then I noticed he was crying.
There were no sobs, no audible gasps, no tremors or shakes, just slow, steady tears of blood dripping from those perfect blue orbs.
“Name’s Arah. I’m an Angel.”
Arah downed the goblet of wine, flecks of his bloody tears caking the glass’s rim.
“Behold, I send an angel before you to guard you on the way and to bring you to the place that I have prepared.”
This obvious machination of my drug addled brain chuckled louder this time, a slight slur and anger tinging his words.
“I’m even less for all that religious babble than I am for wine. Though this shit’s pretty damn good, I gotta admit.”
“LIAR!” Arah screamed, shaking the whole bar. His eyes were wide and obsidian and his chest heaved heavily.
“Liar.” This, a quiet whisper.
“You spent your whole life in church.
You soaked up every hopeful word, every promise of redemption and fixing, and the truth of that still rattles around inside you.
You can stick all the needles you want into that arm so you can lie to yourself and take away the pain you were meant to bear, but you can’t lie to me. We see everything, for we are many.”
Arah refreshed his glass with a small flourish of his hand before downing it again, his disposition getting slightly wobblier.
“DRINK!” he screamed, and when the world stopped shaking and those eyes turned blue again, I sure as shit started pounding the fermented fruit.
Ain't the time to be picky.
“You aren’t having a bad trip. I'm having a bad trip.”
The endless tears of blood fell quicker, like a swift red river coursing from a deep blue waterfall.
Small pools of it began forming of the bar. A slight acrid smell was on the air, barely noticeable behind all the wonderful aromas.
I felt warm and real and firm. I felt human again. My glass had been refilled and I downed another.
Okay, so I was getting wasted with an angel. Admittedly a first, even for my winding and warped road, but getting blitzed on Jesus Juice sure beat pissing off some emotionally unhinged cherub motherfucker.
“I can’t find Him. I can never find Him.”
Slight groans left Arah’s lips and he gulped down another glass.
With a minor twitch, the glass flew and smashed against the wall.
A nanosecond, if even, after the sound of shattering, it reappeared anew, full of the deep blood wine, before him, and he slurped it down his gullet.
I was trying to keep pace with him.
Shit I could drink a fifth of whisky and make it home alive but something in this good good had me slippin’. A part of me knew I should be petrified to ask, but the rest of me was too faded to care.
“Find who? What brings you here, cryin’ tears in yer beers?”
Now I was the one slurring.
“Take them.”
I looked down at the bar.
A belt. A syringe full of something brown and beautiful.
All the gear.
And six shots of what I prayed was Jameson.
“But where sin increased, grace abounded all the more.”
Arah was slurring hard now, slowly spinning in his chair, laughing and crying.
“Have a taste. At least there’ still manna.”
I shot the whole thing and downed that beautiful Irish whisky. Warmth and light filled me up and stole me away from this putrid rock.
Somehow, as wrecked as I was, I felt I could see Arah all the clearer, like the Sun pushing out the remnants of a storm. His hands looked withered, and those blue eyes looked heavy and tired.
“I miss Him. God. Father.”
I began to mumble some apocryphal question, but a raised hand silenced me.
“We’re taking communion here, son, an act of contrition, of grief, celebration and loss. I’m not giving about to give you a seminar on the finer points of how you all bungled what we gave you and called it ‘religion.’ Just shut the fuck up and drink.”
We downed a glass of wine in unison, a broken human and clearly a broken angel, performing a ritual at the alter we were left with.
“You wanna know why I’m here drinkin’? I know you do. I can hear it rattling around in that little rat brain of yours, gnawing, gnawing, gnawing.
Well, here’s why. GOD LEFT.
You remember your Bible.
Like a schizophrenic mother when the voices just crept too far in, he drowned all his children in the bathtub. He felt regret.
You apes can’t come to terms with the fact that it isn’t cognitive dissonance to be perfect and make mistakes. Your binaries and absolutes are the pathetic crutches you rest on, the prisons you build for yourselves. You think you live in the grey but you don’t. You are the simple minded mistake of something far greater than you could possibly fathom.
Hell ain't nothin' but a door locked from the inside.
He was right to drown all of you, ya know.
You’re an abortion that didn’t take.
You’re the science experiment gone wrong.
You’re the motherfucking poisonous residue left over when the manufacturing process goes the slightest bit awry.
He TRIED. He gave you EVERYTHING. And you chased him away.
He wanted to put you all down. Wipe the slate clean. Shoot the wolf with the broken leg caught in the trap. Mercy. But He had made those fuckin’ rainbows, and He kept his word.
You all sit and pout and scream and gnaw and gnash and blow each other up. Always the same shit in this horrible flat circle.
"My god is real, your god is fake! "
You never once consider you’re all talking about the same damn thing, and more to the point, you're spend your entire lives debating His existence. What a catastrophic waste to be so far from the mark.
Is He real? Is He a fairy tale?
Is there a big bearded man with a sword in the sky or is it just what some primitive apes told themselves to explain the lights in the night sky, a mechanism of control and purpose in an entropic and meaningless world?”
I felt frozen listening to Arah rant.
Somewhere, between the distant sound of brutal words, I heard that radio kick on.
The Third Planet is sure that they’re being watched
By an Eye in the Sky that can’t be stopped
And when you get to the Promised Land
You’re gonna shake the Eye’s hand”
“You won’t.”
Arah spoke quietly and sipped and audibly sobbed.
“I…I won’t what?”
“Shake his hand. He’s GONE.
You all fight with words and books and swords and shells and atoms about whether he exists. It’s your relentless, simpleminded addiction to dichotomy. It would be so boring if it wasn’t so sickening.
You think He exists, and if He does, He is here and He loves you and hears your stupid little prayers about football and bone cancer and bank accounts and AIDS.
And if He doesn’t exist, well, it’s just a bunch of conmen working over some fools with a fairy tale.
Any of you shitbirds ever consider He exists and LOATHES you? That he cut the cord to that existential phone line and ain’t nobody on the other side of that line anymore?
You live in an infinite universe that is forever exploding and expanding. He exists outside of even that.
You think you’re special? You’re one tiny experiment among so fucking many, I couldn’t make the smartest mathematician in the history of this planet understand how infinitesimally numerically irrelevant you are.
The question isn’t, is God real or is it all a hoax, a self-delusion?
The salient question, Pappy, is whether He’s here. And He ain’t.
He kept his word and let you all live and fester and replicate and mutate like the virus you are. The fruit that ate itself.
But daddy split. Went out for smokes and He ain’t never coming back. Moved onto a new family. Just like He's done again and again and again. And I'm guessing will keep doing 'till He decides He got it right. Ain’t been here for a long time. Long, long time.”
6 glasses of wine appeared before Arah and he downed them all with lightning speed, spewing blood, sobbing and gasping and drinking.
His hair greyed and whitened and fell to the floor.
His nails began to decay and yellow.
The smell of shit and piss and bile crept up and began to make me nauseous.
“And you know who got really fucked? US. The angels.
God gave us instructions and we followed it. We knew what we had and we didn’t deviate. We did our duty. And He left us behind, too.”
Arah’s clothes began to whiten and dirty.
The enrapturing blue of his eyes began to fade, growing paler and lifeless. A wild, twisted beard and belly began to sprout.
“Then it goes and takes along with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there; and the last state of that man becomes worse than the first. That is the way it will also be with this evil generation."
Arah began shrieking.
"Fucking humans.
I AM AN ANGEL OF THE LORD YOUR GOD, AND I AM BOUND FOREVER TO THIS SHITHOLE OF A ROCK, ENDLESSLY SEARCHING THE COSMOS FOR A FATHER I CAN NEVER FIND, TRAPPED IN A PRISON I CAN NEVER LEAVE, FOR A CRIME I DIDN’T COMMIT.
YOU ALL DID THIS.
YOU ALL DID THIS.
YOU DID THIS.”
Arah leapt up and grabbed me by the throat, lifting me on high.
Fire scorched his eyes, leaving empty pale pools singed to a blackened crisp at the edges.
The wild, infested thing I’d seen before held me as though I weighed less than the judgment feather.
He was sobbing.
“I…I just did what I was told.
Do you know what Hell is? There’s no fucking lake of fire or torture rack with goats.
It’s this.
An endless existence having tasted God’s grace and love and then forever being separated from it, eternally searching for that one drug you know you can never find.
'Abashed the devil stood and felt how awful goodness is and saw Virtue in her shape how lovely: and pined his loss.'
This, this place, is Hell.”
All the opium in the world couldn’t save me from the stark terror of this celestial’s tortured judgment.
I was quaking and pissed myself.
“Now I got ya shakin’ in your boots. Nice hooves.”
He threw me and I slammed against the wall and I felt every ounce of wine and heroin and whisky spill out of my body and onto the floor.
In that moment, I felt the unmitigated suffering of absolute sobriety, and I’ve been sober every moment since.
This wild, unfettered thing inched closer to me.
It was only then I noticed the tattoo on his finger more closely. It was…clearer to me now. Everything was. That little cross on his finger was upside down as it faced me.
“What does your name mean, Arah? What did you do that made God leave all his angels behind?”
Arah opened his mouth and two snakes, one a viper, the other a colorful coral, slid out of his mouth and began encircling his head and neck, never striking, never squeezing, simply coiling infinitely.
“YOU FUCKING APES. I’LL RIP THE SOUL OUT OF EACH OF YOU AND EAT IT FOR LIFE ETERNAL.”
Arah, this manifestation of man’s worst nightmare, leapt at me, blood spewing, snakes dancing, the bar shaking and burning and reeking.
Alas, Babylon, for me.
Inches from me Arah froze, held still by some unseen force, his mouth snarling words that only came out as unintelligible, wet squelches.
A voice from the bar’s door whispered a single word.
“World.
In the first tongue, 'Arah' meant ‘World.’
At the door stood an older black woman with the kindest eyes I’d ever seen.
She wore a bracelet of thorns and a dress made of every flower my mind could conceive.
Golden eyes flecked with amber looked at me lovingly.
She quietly sauntered up to Arah and shook her head wistfully, a disapproving but loving mother wishing her child would just behave.
“You would do well to accept your place here, Arah. The Father may be gone, but this is where you and your lot stay. It was not man’s fall that bound you here.
Tell him what you did...Angel.”
Arah fell suddenly to the barroom floor, all the strength clearly sucked out of him.
“I..I did what I was told. I followed the orders I was given. It was for Him, Uriel.”
Uriel tutted her tongue as though an impudent child had told her a silly, obvious fib.
“You can lie to yourself all you want, Arah, but you cannot lie to me.
You, who whispered endlessly to Herod.
You, who dwelt in Caligula.
You, who served Qin Shi Huang.
You, who sought refuge in Robespierre .
You, who possessed Mengele.
‘And the angels who did not keep their positions of authority but abandoned their proper dwelling—these he has kept in darkness, bound with everlasting chains for judgment on the great Day.”
Uriel helped me to my feet, brushed me off, and lightly put her hand on her cheek. It was the only moment in my life I knew what the word “home” meant.
“And you won’t lie to Man, either.
You remember the deal you begged for, Arah? Let remind you:
'They began to entreat Him, saying, “If You are going to cast us out, send us into the herd of swine.'
You had the gall to call his creation, however staggeringly imperfect, swine.
You got what you asked for, then.
And you will have it for all time.
Get behind me.”
Uriel picked me up as though I were a mere baby and carried me to my truck. She laid me gently in the passenger side and started the engine.
The radio kicked on.
I’m a rolling stone
All alone and lost
For a life of sin
I have paid the cost
Take my advice
Or you’ll curse the day
You started rollin’ down
That Lost Highway”
As she pulled away, I looked back at The Man from Capernaum one last time.
It was consumed in fire and the squeals of pigs shrieking carried through the cool night air.
“Do not pity him.
‘You cannot drink the cup of the Lord and the cup of demons.’
God may have left this world but let the Demon burn.”
submitted by PappyStrangeLife to nosleep [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:31 Righteous_Fury224 Yesterday’s Hero – Book 2 – Signs and Portents – Chapter 4 - I like the Way You Move – Part 8

2181 – 09:17, Wednesday, January 17th –Agora of the Asari People- Serrice City - Thessia – Parnithia System
"It's done," said Nari in a faint croaking voice as she took a few shaky steps back from her magnum opus – a mural that depicted horror yet hope in the image.
"Easy there Nari," said Sam'nelea gently as she caught the exhausted artist in her arms. Mayises and Miretse rushed up and helped Sam'nelea carry Nari to a chair, giving her a bottle of energy drink so the exhausted artist could at least rehydrate.
"So it is finished Colonel T'goos?," asked Matriarch Seucsha T'sola as she called from behind the barrier that shielded the work from viewing.
"Yes Matriarch. Please, come and see Nari's masterpiece," replied Sam'nelea as she held Nari's head so that the shattered artist could drink.
Mayises was holding the bottle for Nari who swallowed greedily at the nourishing refreshing liquid. She had worked almost 18 hours a day on the mural, only stopping to rest when Sam'nelea forced her to. Even then it was barely enough yet Nari found an inner strength that Sam'nelea and her commandos could but only admire at the artists determination to complete this work.
Matriarch Seucsha T'sola of Serrice had also deployed her commandos to guard Nari and her work. The Serricean matriarch had seen the images of the horror under Fortress T'reaphia and was physically sick afterwards. Nothing like this had ever been seen on Thessia… ever. Asari had a dark side, that was undisputable but this… this was pure evil.
"Dear goddess!" she gasped as she and her senior officers came around the corner and saw the mural. There was cries of shock, anger, revulsion, despair and sadness from all when they saw what Nari had painted. Nari had also carved in bright red sandstone that sat above the mural, the High Thessian pictograms for the words: NEVER FORGET!
Sam'nelea surveyed the artwork with a studious glance. She could see that Nari had been heavily influenced by human art, so very obviously in this case as Nari's mural was a homage to both Picassos "Guernica" and Munch's "The Scream" but balanced by Van Gogh's "Starry Night" for the idea that hope still existed.
Sam'nelea had seen those artworks herself on Earth and was deeply moved by them and appreciated what Nari had incorporated into her mural.
Duncan's influence was evident for those who knew the friendship between the artist and the man who lived twice. The Commando officer was aware of that he had been showing Nari the best of human art.
"What a lurid, emotive, extremely confronting work," murmured Matriarch T'sola as she stared at it awestruck. A tear of empathy had trickled down her flawless lavender cheek. "This will be a testament as long as the Agora of the People stands." Her officers nodded in assent, too moved to speak themselves. "Did you see it, Sam?" she asked quietly.
"No matriarch and I thank all the deities and the universe that I didn't. I saw some of the footage that my matriarch displayed to all of you. That was enough. Even now, the Acolytes and house troopers who were there are still undergoing mental therapy for the trauma they were exposed to."
"And your War Artist? Will she be whole again?" the matriarch inquired with compassion for Nari in her eyes.
"I believe, no… I know she will be fine. Nari is one of the strongest Asari I have met. Her mental drive and fortitude allowed her to produce this masterwork in just over ten days. She barely slept and only rested, ate and drank when I forced her too. Look, she has passed out from exhaustion," said Sam'nelea with a sad resonate tone with deep sympathy in her eyes for her new friend. "She is a true hero of the Asari People matriarch. Not one of valour and great deeds of action, but of her strength of spirit and her artistic talent. Let that be known in Serrice."
The Serricean matriarch nodded in total agreement.
"Her work will last for all time. Go home Sam. You, Nari and your commandos have done enough. I will post guards here on permanent duty. Fiahnni can send some across to be part of the guard who protect this… lesson to us all. We will invite other matriarchs to send their house troops to become a part of the detachment. I will house and feed them all. This will be a sacred duty, separate from being guards here at the Agora. This will be our privilege and duty to all the Asari people."
Matriarch Seucsha T'sola nodded once more to herself, knowing that only just over half of the republics would contribute troops to this force. The others like the Armali would prevaricate and dither, ultimately sending nothing which in all honestly, she was fine with. Less in the end for her to pay for and more glory to those that did contribute.
"As you command matriarch and thank you for all you support and aid. It is greatly appreciated." Sam'nelea gestured to her commando lieutenants and bring Nari's sleeping form with them. "I need to see my daughters and husband," she said tiredly.
Matriarch T'sola gave the Colonel at questioning look.
"I must ask Sam… what is it like being loved by a human male? I truly wish to know as I am considering my…options for a new partner."
Sam'nelea paused for a moment and thought about how to respond.
"Matriarch… I cannot answer that with any real ease in such a short space of time. All I can say is that Phillipe completes me. I met him almost twenty years ago and have never found a more loving, wonderful soul to share my life with and have daughters by. I wish Tevura's blessing upon you if you truly wish to find love with a man. It is challenging as you would understand yet… so rewarding as well once you have melded and know beyond any doubt that he is yours and you are his. I love him with every fibre of my being. We are one. Now… I should go," she said with a sigh as thoughts of her beloved husband threatened to engulf her.
"Be at peace Sam and Athame bless you," replied Matriarch T'sola with a soft smile as she considered Sam'nelea's words very carefully.
Sam'nelea, along with Dr Hethy and a few hundred others were some of the originals who bonded with humans. They were not the first but still, those individuals who in 2161, formed a coterie of Asari which became bonded to humans that year, changing Asari society forever. She vaguely recalled that one of her own junior clerical diplomats based at the Citadel bonded with a famous human male artist yet she couldn't recall their names off hand. No matter, the unions that worked were true examples of love crossing cultural and species lines. Fiahnni was right, Humanity and Asari would be one people in the end.
Seucsha signalled to her senior officers and Acolytes, that they take over from the departing T'daari forces. She also began considering her options of looking for a potential consort from the pool of humanity. The matriarch needed someone she could confide in, who would hold and love her in the dark of the night. She felt too lonely these days and taking an Acolyte to her bed had lost its allure as it was just sex for sex's sake, nothing more. Seucsha needed companionship more than ever after seeing Nari's work. The matriarch made up her mind, she would find her Siame in humanity.
Maybe a young man like the musical Maestro Matriarch Jami Sibeyr had found with her young human Siame? she considered.
Seucsha decided that she needed to speak with the Maestro to gain more insight. She concluded that a young man would last the time with her for her remaining years, they would grow old together which was a great comfort to her as the thought of outliving another bondmate would be too much for her to bare. The matriarch mused to herself that she might even have another daughter with him. They could at least try, after all Benezia T'Soni had her little Liara only a hundred or so years ago. That had been the subject of much gossip within the conclave of matriarchs.
She turned away and began humming the maestro's beautifully soaring piece to herself. "A Love Song for Humanity" which was universally recognised as one of the greatest pieces of Asari music which had been created in generations. Now she began to see why, as she reflected upon what she had observed of Fiahnni's daughters and their relationship with Duncan Larkin.
Pity he was taken, she thought to herself as she left the building to board her waiting air-transporter, he would have made an excellent bondmate and consort.
The gull wing doors of her vehicle closed and as she was whisked away into the busy sky. She sat back into the plush soft leather seats and began opening the Matchmaking site, "Blue to Hue" on her datapad.
What charmed her the most, making her laugh and dispelling the awful visions of the horror that Nari had depicted, was that a classic human song started playing as soon as the Extranet site opened up on her data pad. She knew of this song and smiled widely in approval.
Queen's "Somebody to Love" was a perfect complement for the matchmaking site.
The 894 year old matriarch now began examining the hundreds of thousands of hopeful men who had listed themselves and had been ever so carefully screened as potential bondmates to Asari by the managers of the matchmaking site.
She had time and options and she was now looking forwards to Fiahnni's daughter's fashion show.
So much fun to be had!
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
2181 – Friday - January 19 – 19:30 – Lyriania's Memorial Amphitheatre – Dassus City
Lileah'sah peeked out from behind the huge gauze stage curtain, over the massive crowd that had filled the amphitheatre with pride and amazement.
"I still can't believe it," she said quietly to Duncan as they observed the full venue from the wings of the stage.
He held her in front of him, his arms wrapping over hers, around her waist and linking over her belly comfortably. She loved that. Turning her head, she laid her left cheek against his chest so as not to poke him with the tendrils of her crest. It was the only thing she thought that humans had as a minor physical advantage over Asari, they had no crest at the back of their heads that could get in the way of things.
"Believe it my love. Our terrific Tre'mete has done it. Tonight is going to make her a legend. She deserves this."
Lileah'sah turned in his arms and looked up at him with a hint of self-doubt in her eyes.
"I know. Although a part of me feels shame Duncan. I should have done this decades ago for her yet I didn't. I was a selfish, self-centred, spoilt stupid maiden, too wrapped up in her own Varen-shit to do the right thing by the one who had always loved me for who I was. Tre'mete only ever wanted me to love her. You did this for her, not me," she said with a heavy sigh and laid her head back on his chest once more.
Duncan cuddled her tenderly.
"Hey there sweetness, you have helped our crazy mad amazing seamstress and bondmate. You have been her tower of strength through this. You have been at her side all the way, helping her with the business side of things. She couldn't have done this without you. Yes I have been the catalyst that brought this into existence but you my magnificent, musical healer, you were the one who made it all happen. Tre' would have been lost without your family connections. No one would have taken her seriously if not for you going to all those meetings with her. Now she is on the cusp of her triumph and we will celebrate like never before. Look, all our family are here, all our friends too. Tre'mete has worked herself hard and I think it was a stroke of genius that she got everyone in the crew, plus our friends children to be models for her garments tonight."
"Again you are correct my dearest darling man. Their Aretḗ is going to only soar after tonight. And Chianay and Elanini… goddess… I would never have thought that my beloved cousins would be fashion models," she giggled lightly.
It had taken the trio plus Chianay and Ray a lot of diligent work to finally persuade the shy, bookish Intelligence Analyst to model some of Tre'mete's clothing tonight. Elanini would be modelling the more demure and reserved lines of garments that Tre'mete had designed, clothing suited for Asari of Elanini's demeanour. The normally quiet Asari was now abuzz with excitement and nervous energy. Ray spoke to her in her aural bud.
"Remember Ela', you are beautiful, powerful and strong. All eyes will be on you but you will see none as you will be bathed in glorious light. Consider this a simple walk in the sunshine wearing fine clothing that your cousin has made for you."
"Thank you Ray. I am glad you are with me. I couldn't have done this without you."
"You are my family Ela' and my friend and I will do anything for you," said Ray humbly and meant every word.
Elanini blew a gentle kiss to one of the security cameras, knowing that Ray was watching her like a guardian angel. Chianay hugged her younger sister in a sign of affectionate support.
The AI along with Luenthvi were the masters behind the curtain, controlling all aspects of the upcoming show. Luenthvi was in the control room supervising the sound and lighting engineers and technicians in conjunction with Ray. Both Asari and AI had planned everything down to the last detail with Tre'mete, leaving nothing to chance. She got the two minute signal.
"Alright everyone, game faces on, it's showtime!" she said in a quiet yet commanding voice.
The Asari engineers and technicians nodded and began their final prechecks of all the systems.
A few minutes earlier, Fiahnni, Aenthiah and Raquelia, the family and close friends had been the last to enter the amphitheatre. A soaring glorious composition of human music rang out as the trio of Asari gracefully made their way through the building. Fiahnni had fallen in love with Händel's "Messiah" recently and shamelessly appropriated various pieces from the opera for herself. Her people loved it.
Jonah, Lomu, Di'naka and Nyanyzia flanked the Grand Matriarch, Fiahnni and Aenthiah. All the bodyguards resplendent in gleaming ceremonial yet fully functional battle armour.
Drokk led them all.
The Battlemaster's face was a picture of serenity as he quietly basked in the triumph of his clan. Krogan were ascendant, well at least in the republic of Dassus and only his clan but details, details he thought to himself with a gleeful inner smile. It was a start he mused to himself.
A storm of applause went up for the Grand Matriarch and Fiahnni, with people rising to their seats and cheering. They all knew what had happened two weeks prior; that the T'daari had shielded the people of Dassus from harm, had struck back at their hated enemies and triumphed, liberating the republic of Ulee from tyranny and returned it back to the rule of the people, by the people for the people. These were deeds worthy of song and celebration.
Fiahnni and Raquelia waved and smiled to their people who roared back with approval.
Behind them walked Kash'shara and Tito with Mirey and Hiroko by their sides. The rest of the family followed including Chianay and Elanini's mother, Sister Shaellei T'daari as well as other lesser relatives of the clan. Behind them came the human families as well as the Duke and Duchess of Northumberland, with the senior Acolytes and staff of House T'daari bringing up the end of the procession.
There was a mild degree of puzzlement in the crowd as they wondered amongst themselves where Lileah'sah and Duncan were and why they were not walking with the first family of Dassus? The reason, only known to the immediate family, was that Duncan had insisted that the couple didn't as he wanted the family to receive the ovation, not him. Also Lileah'sah and he were to open the show with some words of welcome to the audience.
Lileah'sah, while wanting him to be cheered, understood. In many ways such public ovations actually embarrassed Duncan. He almost hated them and avoided them as much as he could. It was enough for him to have done good for no acknowledgement as he followed the teachings of Marcus Aurelias in that fashion as best he could.
"We ought to do good to others as simply as a horse runs, or a bee makes honey, or a vine bears grapes season after season without thinking of the grapes it has borne." - Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book Five
Lileah'sah now embraced that maxim for herself. Tre'mete was still on her journey in this regard yet Duncan and herself knew their bondmate would get there soon enough.
Everyone now settled in their seats and the murmuring of the crowd died down.
The lights dimmed down to nothing, blackness engulfing the massive space with only the safety lights running along the stairways visible.
"It's time love," whispered Duncan as he took her left hand in his right. She nodded, gave his hand a squeeze and led him out.
They followed the faint light trail out onto the stage and made their way to their mark.
The spotlights came on a few seconds later, bathing the couple in a soft warm glow rather than a harsh bright white light.
"Good eve to you all, distinguished matriarchs, Justicars, honoured guests and gentle beings and welcome one and all. Tonight you are going to witness a watershed moment in Asari society. Tre'mete Lira, my best friend, my darling lover, my bond and soul mate has been inspired to follow her dream by my other magnificent bond and soul mate, Duncan Larkin. He has given her the wings in which she now will soar with. I present to you all, the first ever collection from Saucy Secrets. Thank you."
Lileah'sah bowed her head while Duncan just nodded briefly to the applause from the audience.
The lights dimmed again as the couple left the stage and went back to the wings.
The stage had been configured to be a massive runway, twenty meters in length and four meters wide, running into the heart of the audience. Lights appeared around the edge of the stage as the main gauze curtain rose.
The raising curtain revealed a full traditional thirty three member Asari orchestra, standing ready behind their ancient traditional Gal'lungael percussion instruments and drums.
Smoke machines expelled their scented, fragrant contents into the air and tiny particles of glitter fell from the domed ceiling, creating a myriad of sparkling motes of light that dazzled the senses.
The music started.
A resoundingly massive explosive thunderclap initially startled the audience was immediately followed by an ancient time-honoured piece of Asari ageless battle music which opened the show.
The drumming and rhythmical percussion started, the Asari musicians all acting in perfect harmony as they expertly pounded out the ancient song on their traditional instruments and drums. Blue Biotic auras flared up from the Asari musicians as they merged their fields with the instruments, creating intricate resonating cascades of interweaving harmonics.
The Asari orchestra then chanted out the archaic words, lifted together in glorious song:
"We are here, We are alive, We exist, We are One!".
All Asari knew this piece as it was timeless, a musical racial memory that reached back into their mists of their distant past, passed down from mother to daughter, generation to generation, yay unto the very first Asari who could remember who she was.
It was burned into the very DNA and souls of the Asari people.
All the Asari in the amphitheatre instinctively sang at the top of their voices, joining in the ancient song unconsciously. The Asari joyously sang out loudly and passionately, feeling the moment and its significance upon them.
This was the ultimate signifier of change, of death and rebirth, the end of old things, the dying of the light and the dawn of the beginning of new ideas.
The future is always born in conflict and pain. Change is inevitable.
Tre'mete was creating a massive statement to her people, the times were indeed "a changing".
The song concluded with a finale crescendo that resonated hugely within the amphitheatre.
As soon as the piece had finished, the spectators thundered out with massive approval, standing, cheering, clapping and shouting as this had not been performed in living memory to a live audience. And not a single garment had been displayed yet.
The lights dimmed once more and the audience settled back into their seats, all abuzz now as this was not your usual fashion show. This was art.
A new, more modern composition of Asari music began, starting softly yet building up, swelling with intensity and passion.
The lights focused on the stage and out strode a supremely confident Olivia McAlpine, dressed impeccably in an amazing ensemble that shouted style, elegance, charm and suitability for a young teenage maiden Asari.
Olivia was followed by her faithful companion Zara Wattling then Eliza Percy and finally Sam'nelea's daughters Gabriella and Triana Aguilar. All the Asari teenagers beamed their dazzling smiles to the roar of approval of the crowd as they strode down the runway. Already Asari matrons in the audience and those watching live began to place orders for these clothes for their young daughters as the garments looked so lovely yet sturdy and comfortable, perfect for a growing young Asari.
The teens paraded down the runway, stepping in time to the soaring music. Each stopped at the end, striking a series of poses before sauntering back to the stage as though it was just another day walking in the park.
The music shifted into a more militaristic themed tune.
Tre'mete had asked her comrades from the Perihelion if they would model for her. All stepped forward without a moment of hesitation.
Led proudly by Captain Eshess, the elite crew marched out to the deafening hailing of the audience. New ceremonial parade uniforms for the Dassus Navy were on display and by the goddess they looked good was the consensus. Tre'mete came up with this herself as she knew that military contracts were always a big money earner. She would win it on merit, not her family connections. Tre'mete knew that her fellow commandos and Navy personnel would clamour for these new uniforms.
The crew all marched casually, with smiles all alight on their beautiful faces, waving to the cheering crowd. They looked magnificent as they filed down the runway.
As the last crew member departed the stage, new music followed the last piece.
Stepping into the light came Icilea and Heretonia, hand in hand with Pania Paewai and Emily Percy, Human and Turian together, an unmistakable symbol of the end of the enmity and the beginning of deep and enduring friendship between the species.
A huge roar of approval went up from everyone in the amphitheatre. A masterstroke of galactical political genius by Tre'mete and the T'daari family. An emblem of harmony and reconciliation which would hopefully resonate beyond Thessia.
The Turian females wore long elegant blue and silver gowns that perfectly suited their body structure and morphology while the young human women were clothed in similar Thessian Glitterwing black silk ball gowns, yet theirs were cut with plunging necklines and slit just enough on one side to reveal their shapely, long legs much to the salacious delight of all the Asari watching.
The four graceful beings made their way down the runway, gently waving and smiling to the audience who lustily cheered them on. Orders from the hundreds of thousands of Turian females who had made their home on Thessia began flowing in as well as the tens of thousands of human women watching who were also Thessian citizens, both species bonded to Asari.
Tre'mete, who was watching from the wings, saw on her data pad the stream of tens of thousands of orders which were flooding Saucy Secret's Extranet site.
She, Ray and Duncan had planned for this. Ray had networks of extra server farms to handle the deluge of incoming traffic. If they hadn't have done this, the whole site would have crashed leaving tens of thousands of potential customers angry and upset.
The brawny commando felt her bondmates gather her in their arms and she sighed with a blissful exhalation. This was what she had always dreamed of; her creations being something that people wanted to buy. And the love of her bondmates surrounding her was mana from the heavens.
Tre'mete had made it.
"I will always love you Tre'mete," said Duncan in her aural canal on her right side while Lileah'sah had to briefly ignite her lifting field to rise a few inches to be on the level of Tre'mete's left side aural canal.
"You will always be my heart Tre' my love," she whispered as they both embraced the muscular Asari.
Tre'mete closed her eyes and held back her tears of pure joy as she couldn't afford to have her make up ruined by streaks of tears.
"We are One," was all she could say back to them. Her bondmates lightly kissed her cheeks then laced their arms around Tre'mete's waist, the triad standing together, loving, indivisible and resolute, watching the show they had planned together over the past few weeks unfold.
The Turians and human females made their way back to the stage as the music switched into something that almost no one in the amphitheatre had ever heard before.
A driving electronic tune that had an incredible melody and kick ass back beat.
Olivia walked back out onto the runway after her and her companions had quickly changed, leading them once more, her confident radiant smile beaming for all to see. The Asari teenagers danced up the runway, skipping and twirling to this thumping surging electronica track. The audience took up the beat and started clapping in time with it. Many were inspired to stand up to dance to the music. Soon almost all in the amphitheatre were dancing.
The teens were dressed in chic and classy tunics and pants, each in a different arrangement and colour. Again, Asari mothers with young daughters nodded with approval and clicked the order button on their Omnitools and data pads. This was exactly what young Asari needed. The style was fashionable, and multi-purpose as it could be for formal occasions or everyday wear.
The music was replaced by a banging piece of electro-swing that made everyone's open eyes wide as this tune just rocked.
The Perihelion crew then sauntered out, dancing merrily to the music while the teens were still dancing out the front. Tre'mete had chosen to emulate classic human styles in the line up and had dressed her crew mates in garments that were inspired by 1920's fashions. Light silk knee length Flapper dresses with dozens of thin tassels scintillatingly shimmered and shined gloriously as the crew sashayed down the runway. Her choice of style and music massively gingered up the already excited crowd.
This wasn't art anymore, this was an EVENT!
Asari worldwide got their first taste of electro-swing music, loving the infectious melody and driving danceable beats as they watched the crew and the teens now Jive and Lindy Hop with each other on the stage. The Asari on the stage and runway used their biotics and lifted one another as they spun and twirled in time to the incredible rhythm.
The crowd went wild with cheering and tried to follow this phenomenal new style of dancing. Maidens globally and beyond into the Asari colonies, opened up Human Extranet pages, madly searching for lessons and examples on how to dance like this.
Olivia led her companions back through the dancing crew, waving to the cheers of the crowd.
Aenthiah watched her ward, her heart nearly bursting with pride. She sat with her own daughter, holding her hand, both of them totally transfixed by the sensational spectacle unfolding before them.
"Mother, she is incredible," said Lysila into Aenthiah's aural canal over the noise of the crowd and music. The Asari was most impressed with Matriarch Ruto's granddaughter and had recently heard the dramatic story of how Olivia and her two friends had defeated six commandos in hand to hand combat thanks to the training given by her mother to the teenagers.
"As are you my most precious child," responded Aenthiah with love in her eyes.
The Justicar was thrilled that Lysila had excepted her invitation to attend the show. That Lysila came at all was a minor miracle as she often avoided meeting her mother, the galactically famous Justicar, as she was completely against violence in all its forms although she did approve of Olivia's act of self-defence and understood what Aenthiah had committed herself to. She reached out and took Aenthiah's hand in hers and gently squeezed. A stone melted in the Justicar's heart as mother and daughter sat and enjoyed the amazing event together.
The lights dimmed once more and a new style of music began. A thumping base line with a loud high hat four four drum beat. The lights came back on.
Icilea, Heretonia, Emily and Pania strutted back onto the stage, this time dressed in very revealing underwear. The audience gasps them roared out their approval as they now examined what the four females were wearing. Saucy Secrets was now a legend in fashion as Tre'mete knew exactly what would suit humans and Turian females.
The four females had sultry, saucy wiggle in their hips as the seductively wandered down the runway. The crowd now heard a growly human voice begin to speak over the music as the four danced in a semi erotic fashion. The lights seemed to dim as the man continued to speak.
"There's so many things I like about you,
I just don't know where to begin,
I like the way you, look at me with those beautiful eyes,
I like the way you, act all surprised,
I like the way you, sing along,
I like the way you, always get it wrong,
I like the way you, clap your hands,
I like the way you, love to dance,
I like the way you, put your hands up in the air,
I like the way you, shake your hair,
I like the way you, like to touch,
I like the way you, stare so much,
But most of all...
Yeah.
Most of all..."
The music built to a rising crescendo, then the beat dropped and out stepped Chianay and Elanini.
I like the way you move...
[Songwriters: Christopher James Karyotakis / Dylan Burns]
The crowd went mental as the gorgeously stunning sisters strode and strutted down the stage together, the epitome of Asari beauty on glorious display. Never before had a consort deigned to be a fashion model yet this was perfection.
Once the initial sensation had passed the audience focused on what the sisters were wearing.
Mouths were covered in shock and eyes widened hilarious amazement as they could clearly see on the enormous video screens which clearly displayed what Chianay and Elanini had on.
The pair were wearing a well cut lacey silk bra that had a pair of Blue hands printed on the front of the cups, seemingly holding the breasts within.
It was the underwear though that nearly caused a riot.
Both were wearing the panties that Duncan had come up with.
Stunning high cut panties cut in a thong style, both silvery white in colour, covered in lots of little ice-cream cones with the logo printed boldly on the front in High Thessian saying,
"It's not going to lick itself!"
Pandemonium!
Laughter, incredulous screaming, raucous cheering and furious applause erupted from the crowd.
Lysila sat stunned, wide eyed while Aenthiah just smirked to herself as she knew what the crowning moment of the show would be as she had regularly melded with Duncan, both of them sharing their thoughts and experiences. She knew how his incredibly cheeky and mischievous mind worked. And she knew Tre'mete would have nearly wet herself laughing when he told her of this idea.
The Justicar glanced across to her left and saw her faithful Acolyte Saendi howling with laughter as were other members of the T'daari family. Raquelia was gently shaking her head but had a huge smile on her face. Fiahnni was cackling like a lunatic. Kash'shara was totally gobsmacked while Tito had fallen off his chair laughing in hysterics. Mirey and Hiroko were shrieking in convulsive giggles. The human families with their Asari partners that were now a part of the house of T'daari were howling with merriment at the audacity that Duncan and Tre'mete had gone with. Even Drokk and Fiahnni's bodyguards couldn't contain themselves. Aenthiah was heartened to see Nari and Lyessrae creased up laughing together at the ridiculously funny panties. She was especially amused to see Chianay and Elanini's mother, Sister Shaellei, guffawing loudly at the sight of her daughters wearing such lurid underwear.
The biggest joke in Asari history was an astoundingly enormous success.
Always make 'em laugh… thought Duncan as he hugged Tre'mete tightly while the trio watched from the wings.
The teenagers and crew came out, this time dressed in a combination of swimwear and casual attire, all now dancing to the ecstatic adulation of the audience who were all up and grooving away to the fantastic music being played.
The BodyRocker's song finally finished and all the models on stage turned and started to clap to welcome the true star of the show, Tre'mete.
Daft Punk's "One More Time" classic track started playing as Tre'mete, walked out leading her bondmates with her. A furious storm of applause and biotic Asari salutes resonated throughout the space.
There was no need for the audience to give a standing ovation as the entire amphitheatre were already on their feet dancing.
Tre'mete, radiant with a smile of quiet triumph, stepped forward letting go of her bondmates hands, took her bow and waved to the adulation of the crowd.
She had succeeded beyond her wildest dreams. Tre'mete turned and took her bondmates hands in hers and led them in bowing again to the audience and those watching from beyond. She could not have done this without them. Tre'mete shone with a biotic glow of pure happiness.
Saucy Secrets was a sensational stellar success.
submitted by Righteous_Fury224 to HFY [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:28 _Triple_ [STORE] 900+ KNIVES/GLOVES/SKINS, 50.000$+ INVENTORY. M9 Fade, M4 Poseidon, Kara Gamma, BFK Freehand, BFK Bright Water, Spec Gloves Kimono, Nomad Fade, M9 Doppler, Skeleton, BFK B.Steel, AWP Fade, Stiletto Fade, S.Gloves Slingshot, BFK Ultra, Kara Damas, Bayo Lore, Bayo Gamma, Flip Fade & A Lot More

Everything in my inventory is up for trade. The most valuable items are listed here, the rest you can find in My Inventory

Feel free to Add Me or even better send a Trade Offer. Open for any suggestions: upgrades, downgrades / knives, gloves, skins / stickers, patterns, floats.

All Buyouts are listed in cash value.

KNIVES

★ Butterfly Knife Freehand FN #1, B/O: $1867

★ Butterfly Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $1098

★ Butterfly Knife Blue Steel BS, B/O: $907

★ Butterfly Knife Ultraviolet FT, B/O: $789

★ Butterfly Knife Stained FT, B/O: $695


★ Bayonet Tiger Tooth MW #1, B/O: $888

★ Bayonet Gamma Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $727

★ Bayonet Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $608

★ Bayonet Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $521

★ Bayonet Rust Coat BS, B/O: $253

★ Bayonet Night FT, B/O: $251

★ StatTrak™ Bayonet Lore MW, B/O: $751


★ Karambit Gamma Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $1343

★ Karambit Damascus Steel FT, B/O: $774

★ Karambit Rust Coat BS, B/O: $537

★ Karambit Boreal Forest FT, B/O: $488


★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1523

★ M9 Bayonet Fade FN, B/O: $1523

★ M9 Bayonet Doppler (Phase 4) FN, B/O: $1008

★ M9 Bayonet Blue Steel FT, B/O: $534

★ M9 Bayonet Rust Coat BS, B/O: $449


★ Flip Knife Fade FN, B/O: $703

★ Flip Knife Gamma Doppler (Phase 1) MW, B/O: $509

★ Flip Knife Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $406

★ Flip Knife Freehand FT, B/O: $228

★ StatTrak™ Flip Knife Bright Water FN, B/O: $332


★ Falchion Knife Doppler (Phase 2) FN, B/O: $292

★ Falchion Knife Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $264

★ Falchion Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $258

★ Falchion Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $133


★ Stiletto Knife Fade FN, B/O: $822

★ Stiletto Knife Slaughter FN, B/O: $569

★ Stiletto Knife Doppler (Phase 1) FN, B/O: $530

★ Stiletto Knife Crimson Web FT, B/O: $396

★ StatTrak™ Stiletto Knife Scorched FT, B/O: $172


★ Gut Knife Doppler (Sapphire) MW #1, B/O: $830

★ Gut Knife Fade FN, B/O: $204

★ Gut Knife Tiger Tooth FN, B/O: $138

★ Gut Knife Bright Water MW, B/O: $104

★ Gut Knife Freehand FT, B/O: $92

★ Gut Knife Urban Masked FT, B/O: $82

★ StatTrak™ Gut Knife Rust Coat BS, B/O: $93


★ Shadow Daggers Fade FN, B/O: $258

★ Shadow Daggers Doppler (Phase 3) FN, B/O: $165

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel FT, B/O: $82

★ Shadow Daggers Bright Water FT, B/O: $82

★ Shadow Daggers Blue Steel WW, B/O: $80

★ Shadow Daggers Rust Coat BS, B/O: $74

★ StatTrak™ Shadow Daggers Marble Fade FN, B/O: $186


★ Classic Knife Slaughter MW, B/O: $311

★ StatTrak™ Classic Knife Stained BS, B/O: $163


★ Talon Knife Slaughter MW, B/O: $605

★ Talon Knife Scorched MW, B/O: $290


★ Ursus Knife Marble Fade FN, B/O: $405

★ Ursus Knife Night Stripe MW, B/O: $162


★ Paracord Knife Stained WW, B/O: $125

★ Paracord Knife Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $97

★ Paracord Knife Safari Mesh FT, B/O: $96


★ Navaja Knife Safari Mesh FT, B/O: $71

★ Navaja Knife Scorched WW, B/O: $71


★ Nomad Knife Fade FN, B/O: $1015

★ Skeleton Knife, B/O: $909

★ Bowie Knife Boreal Forest MW, B/O: $106

★ Survival Knife Forest DDPAT FT, B/O: $97

GLOVES

★ Driver Gloves Crimson Weave FT, B/O: $335

★ Driver Gloves King Snake BS, B/O: $270

★ Driver Gloves Lunar Weave WW, B/O: $113

★ Driver Gloves Overtake WW, B/O: $88

★ Driver Gloves Overtake BS, B/O: $67


★ Moto Gloves Transport MW, B/O: $171

★ Moto Gloves Polygon BS, B/O: $137

★ Moto Gloves Transport WW, B/O: $71

★ Moto Gloves 3rd Commando Company BS, B/O: $62


★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Kimono WW, B/O: $1027

★ Specialist Gloves Tiger Strike FT, B/O: $654

★ Specialist Gloves Mogul FT, B/O: $295

★ Specialist Gloves Lt. Commander FT, B/O: $277

★ Specialist Gloves Crimson Web FT, B/O: $275


★ Sport Gloves Slingshot FT, B/O: $796

★ Sport Gloves Amphibious BS #2, B/O: $699

★ Sport Gloves Omega FT, B/O: $656


★ Broken Fang Gloves Unhinged BS, B/O: $60

WEAPONS

AK-47 Case Hardened BS, B/O: $130

AK-47 Bloodsport MW, B/O: $79

AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76

AK-47 Fuel Injector BS, B/O: $76

AK-47 Bloodsport FT, B/O: $70

AK-47 Neon Rider MW, B/O: $60


AWP Fade FN, B/O: $864

AWP BOOM MW, B/O: $84

AWP Containment Breach FT, B/O: $69

AWP Containment Breach FT, B/O: $69

AWP Wildfire FT, B/O: $59

AWP Chromatic Aberration FN, B/O: $59

StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $65

StatTrak™ AWP Hyper Beast FT, B/O: $65


Desert Eagle Blaze FN, B/O: $565

Desert Eagle Blaze FN, B/O: $565

Desert Eagle Printstream FN, B/O: $155

Desert Eagle Cobalt Disruption FN, B/O: $58


M4A1-S Icarus Fell FN, B/O: $414

M4A1-S Printstream MW, B/O: $204

M4A1-S Printstream MW, B/O: $204


M4A4 Poseidon FN, B/O: $1402

M4A4 The Emperor FN, B/O: $152

M4A4 Asiimov WW, B/O: $97


USP-S Kill Confirmed MW, B/O: $65

USP-S Printstream FT, B/O: $69

StatTrak™ USP-S Kill Confirmed FT, B/O: $123

StatTrak™ USP-S Neo-Noir FN, B/O: $106


AUG Flame Jörmungandr FN, B/O: $218

P2000 Ocean Foam FN, B/O: $139

Souvenir SSG 08 Death Strike MW, B/O: $81

CZ75-Auto Emerald Quartz MW, B/O: $61

Trade Offer Link - Steam Profile Link - My Inventory

Knives - Bowie Knife, Butterfly Knife, Falchion Knife, Flip Knife, Gut Knife, Huntsman Knife, M9 Bayonet, Bayonet, Karambit, Shadow Daggers, Stiletto Knife, Ursus Knife, Navaja Knife, Talon Knife, Classic Knife, Paracord Knife, Survival Knife, Nomad Knife, Skeleton Knife, Patterns - Gamma Doppler, Doppler (Phase 1, Phase 2, Phase 3, Phase 4, Black Pearl, Sapphire, Ruby, Emerald), Crimson Web, Lore, Fade, Ultraviolet, Night, Marble Fade (Fire & Ice, Fake FI), Case Hardened (Blue Gem), Autotronic, Slaughter, Black Laminate, Tiger Tooth, Boreal Forest, Scorched, Blue Steel, Vanilla, Damascus Steel, Forest DDPAT, Urban Masked, Freehand, Stained, Bright Water, Safari Mesh, Rust Coat, Gloves - Bloodhound Gloves (Charred, Snakebite, Guerrilla, Bronzed), Driver Gloves (Snow Leopard, King Snake, Crimson Weave, Imperial Plaid, Black Tie, Lunar Weave, Diamondback, Rezan the Red, Overtake, Queen Jaguar, Convoy, Racing Green), Hand Wraps (Cobalt Skulls, CAUTION!, Overprint, Slaughter, Leather, Giraffe, Badlands, Spruce DDPAT, Arboreal, Constrictor, Desert Shamagh, Duct Tape), Moto Gloves (Spearmint, POW!, Cool Mint, Smoke Out, Finish Line, Polygon, Blood Pressure, Turtle, Boom!, Eclipse, 3rd Commando Company, Transport), Specialist Gloves (Crimson Kimono, Tiger Strike, Emerald Web, Field Agent, Marble Fade, Fade, Foundation, Lt. Commander, Crimson Web, Mogul, Forest DDPAT, Buckshot), Sport Gloves (Pandora's Box, Superconductor, Hedge Maze, Vice, Amphibious, Slingshot, Omega, Arid, Big Game, Nocts, Scarlet Shamagh, Bronze Morph), Hydra Gloves (Case Hardened, Emerald, Rattler, Mangrove), Broken Fang Gloves (Jade, Yellow-banded, Unhinged, Needle Point), Pistols - P2000 (Wicked Sick, Ocean Foam, Fire Element, Amber Fade, Corticera, Chainmail, Imperial Dragon, Obsidian, Scorpion, Handgun, Acid Etched), USP-S (Printstream, Kill Confirmed, Whiteout, Road Rash, Owergrowth, The Traitor, Neo-Noir, Dark Water, Orion, Blueprint, Stainless, Caiman, Serum, Monster Mashup, Royal Blue, Ancient Visions, Cortex, Orange Anolis, Ticket To Hell, Black Lotus, Cyrex, Check Engine, Guardian, Purple DDPAT, Torque, Blood Tiger, Flashback, Business Class, Pathfinder, Para Green), Lead Conduit, Glock-18 (Umbral Rabbit, Fade, Candy Apple, Bullet Queen, Synth Leaf, Neo-Noir, Nuclear Garden, Dragon Tatto, Reactor, Pink DDPAT, Twilight Galaxy, Sand Dune, Groundwater, Blue Fissure, Snack Attack, Water Elemental, Brass, Wasteland Rebel, Vogue, Franklin, Royal Legion, Gamma Doppler, Weasel, Steel Disruption, Ironwork, Grinder, High Beam, Moonrise, Oxide Blaze, Bunsen Burner, Clear Polymer, Bunsen Burner, Night), P250 (Re.built, Nuclear Threat, Modern Hunter, Splash, Whiteout, Vino Primo, Mehndi, Asiimov, Visions, Undertow, Cartel, See Ya Later, Gunsmoke, Splash, Digital Architect, Muertos, Red Rock, Bengal Tiger, Crimson Kimono, Wingshot, Metallic DDPAT, Hive, Dark Filigree, Mint Kimono), Five-Seven (Neon Kimono, Berries And Cherries, Fall Hazard, Crimson Blossom, Hyper Beast, Nitro, Fairy Tale, Case Hardened, Copper Galaxy, Angry Mob, Monkey Business, Fowl Play, Anodized Gunmetal, Hot Shot, Retrobution, Boost Protocol), CZ75-Auto (Chalice, Crimson Web, Emerald Quartz, The Fuschia is Now, Nitro, Xiangliu, Yellow Jacket, Victoria, Poison Dart, Syndicate, Eco, Hexane, Pole, Tigris), Tec-9 (Rebel, Terrace, Nuclear Threat, Hades, Rust Leaf, Decimator, Blast From, Orange Murano, Toxic, Fuel Injector, Remote Control, Bamboo Forest, Isaac, Avalanche, Brother, Re-Entry, Blue Titanium, Bamboozle), R8 Revolver (Banana Cannon, Fade, Blaze, Crimson Web, Liama Cannon, Crazy 8, Reboot, Canal Spray, Night, Amber Fade), Desert Eagle (Blaze, Hand Cannon, Fennec Fox, Sunset Storm, Emerald Jörmungandr, Pilot, Hypnotic, Golden Koi, Printstream, Cobalt Disruption, Code Red, Ocean Drive, Midnight Storm, Kumicho Dragon, Crimson Web, Heirloom, Night Heist, Mecha Industries, Night, Conspiracy, Trigger Discipline, Naga, Directive, Light Rail), Dual Berettas (Flora Carnivora, Duelist, Cobra Strike, Black Limba, Emerald, Hemoglobin, Twin Turbo, Marina, Melondrama, Pyre, Retribution, Briar, Dezastre, Royal Consorts, Urban Shock, Dualing Dragons, Panther, Balance), Rifles - Galil (Aqua Terrace, Winter Forest, Chatterbox, Sugar Rush, Pheonix Blacklight, CAUTION!, Orange DDPAT, Cerberus, Dusk Ruins, Eco, Chromatic Aberration, Stone Cold, Tuxedo, Sandstorm, Shattered, Urban Rubble, Rocket Pop, Kami, Crimson Tsunami, Connexion), SCAR-20 (Fragments, Brass, Cyrex, Palm, Splash Jam, Cardiac, Emerald, Crimson Web, Magna Carta, Stone Mosaico, Bloodsport, Enforcer), AWP (Duality, Gungnir, Dragon Lore, Prince, Medusa, Desert Hydra, Fade, Lightning Strike, Oni Taiji, Silk Tiger, Graphite, Chromatic Aberration, Asiimov, Snake Camo, Boom, Containment Breach, Wildfire, Redline, Electric Hive, Hyper Beast, Neo-Noir, Man-o'-war, Pink DDPAT, Corticera, Sun in Leo, Elite Build, Fever Dream, Atheris, Mortis, PAW, Exoskeleton, Worm God, POP AWP, Phobos, Acheron, Pit Viper, Capillary, Safari Mesh), AK-47 (Head Shot, Wild Lotus, Gold Arabesque, X-Ray, Fire Serpent, Hydroponic, Panthera Onca, Case Hardened, Vulcan, Jet Set, Fuel Injector, Bloodsport, Nightwish, First Class, Neon Rider, Asiimov, Red Laminate, Aquamarine Revenge, The Empress, Wasteland Rebel, Jaguar, Black Laminate, Leet Museo, Neon Revolution, Redline, Frontside Misty, Predator, Legion of Anubis, Point Disarray, Orbit Mk01, Blue Laminate, Green Laminate, Emerald Pinstripe, Cartel, Phantom Disruptor, Jungle Spray, Safety Net, Rat Rod, Baroque Purple, Slate, Elite Build, Uncharted, Safari Mesh), FAMAS (Sundown, Prime Conspiracy, Afterimage, Commemoration, Dark Water, Spitfire, Pulse, Eye of Athena, Meltdown, Rapid Eye Move, Roll Cage, Styx, Mecha Industrie, Djinn, ZX Spectron, Valence, Neural Net, Night Borre, Hexne), M4A4 (Temukau, Howl, Poseidon, Asiimov, Daybreak, Hellfire, Zirka, Red DDPAT, Radiation Hazard, Modern Hunter, The Emperor, The Coalition, Bullet Rain, Cyber Security, X-Ray, Dark Blossom, Buzz Kill, In Living Color, Neo-Noir, Desolate Space, 龍王 (Dragon King), Royal Paladin, The Battlestar, Global Offensive, Tooth Fairy, Desert-Strike, Griffin, Evil Daimyo, Spider Lily, Converter), M4A1-S (Emphorosaur-S, Welcome to the Jungle, Imminent Danger, Knight, Hot Rod, Icarus Fell, Blue Phosphor, Printstream, Master Piece, Dark Water, Golden Coil, Bright Water, Player Two, Atomic Alloy, Guardian, Chantico's Fire, Hyper Beast, Mecha Industries, Cyrex, Control Panel, Moss Quartz, Nightmare, Decimator, Leaded Glass, Basilisk, Blood Tiger, Briefing, Night Terror, Nitro, VariCamo, Flashback), SG 553 (Cyberforce, Hazard Pay, Bulldozer, Integrale, Dragon Tech, Ultraviolet, Colony IV, Hypnotic, Cyrex, Candy Apple, Barricade, Pulse), SSG 08 (Death Strike, Sea Calico, Blood in the Water, Orange Filigree, Dragonfire, Big Iron, Bloodshot, Detour, Turbo Peek, Red Stone), AUG (Akihabara Accept, Flame Jörmungandr, Hot Rod, Midnight Lily, Sand Storm, Carved Jade, Wings, Anodized Navy, Death by Puppy, Torque, Bengal Tiger, Chameleon, Fleet Flock, Random Access, Momentum, Syd Mead, Stymphalian, Arctic Wolf, Aristocrat, Navy Murano), G3SG1 (Chronos, Violet Murano, Flux, Demeter, Orange Kimono, The Executioner, Green Apple, Arctic Polar Camo, Contractor), SMGs - P90 (Neoqueen, Astral Jörmungandr, Run and Hide, Emerald Dragon, Cold Blooded, Death by Kitty, Baroque Red, Vent Rush, Blind Spot, Asiimov, Trigon, Sunset Lily, Death Grip, Leather, Nostalgia, Fallout Warning, Tiger Pit, Schermatic, Virus, Shapewood, Glacier Mesh, Shallow Grave, Chopper, Desert Warfare), MAC-10 (Sakkaku, Hot Snakes, Copper Borre, Red Filigree, Gold Brick, Graven, Case Hardened, Stalker, Amber Fade, Neon Rider, Tatter, Curse, Propaganda, Nuclear Garden, Disco Tech, Toybox, Heat, Indigo), UMP-45 (Wild Child, Fade, Blaze, Day Lily, Minotaur's Labyrinth, Crime Scene, Caramel, Bone Pile, Momentum, Primal Saber), MP7 (Teal Blossom, Fade, Nemesis, Whiteout, Asterion, Bloosport, Abyssal Apparition, Full Stop, Special Delivery, Neon Ply, Asterion, Ocean Foam, Powercore, Scorched, Impire), PP-Bizon (Modern Hunter, Rust Coat, Forest Leaves, Antique, High Roller, Blue Streak, Seabird, Judgement of Anubis, Bamboo Print, Embargo, Chemical Green, Coblat Halftone, Fuel Rod, Photic Zone, Irradiated Alert, Carbon Fiber), MP9 (Featherweight, Wild Lily, Pandora's Box, Stained Glass, Bulldozer, Dark Age, Hot Rod, Hypnotic, Hydra, Rose Iron, Music Box, Setting Sun, Food Chain, Airlock, Mount Fuji, Starlight Protector, Ruby Poison Dart, Deadly Poison), MP5-SD (Liquidation, Oxide Oasis, Phosphor, Nitro, Agent, Autumn Twilly), Shotguns, Machineguns - Sawed-Off (Kiss♥Love, First Class, Orange DDPAT, Rust Coat, The Kraken, Devourer, Mosaico, Wasteland Princess, Bamboo Shadow, Copper, Serenity, Limelight, Apocalypto), XM1014 (Frost Borre, Ancient Lore, Red Leather, Elegant Vines, Banana Leaf, Jungle, Urban Perforated, Grassland, Blaze Orange, Heaven Guard, VariCamo Blue, Entombed, XOXO, Seasons, Tranquility, Bone Machine, Incinegator, Teclu Burner, Black Tie, Zombie Offensive, Watchdog), Nova (Baroque Orange, Hyper Beast, Green Apple, Antique, Modern Hunter, Walnut, Forest Leaves, Graphite, Blaze Orange, Rising Skull, Tempest, Bloomstick, Interlock, Quick Sand, Moon in Libra, Clean Polymer, Red Quartz, Toy Soldier), MAG-7 (Insomnia, Cinqueda, Counter Terrace, Prism Terrace, Memento, Chainmail, Hazard, Justice, Bulldozer, Silver, Core Breach, Firestarter, Praetorian, Heat, Hard Water, Monster Call, BI83 Spectrum, SWAG-7), M249 (Humidor, Shipping Forecast, Blizzard Marbleized, Downtown, Jungle DDPAT, Nebula Crusader, Impact Drill, Emerald Poison Dart), Negev (Mjölnir, Anodized Navy, Palm, Power Loader, Bratatat, CaliCamo, Phoenix Stencil, Infrastructure, Boroque Sand), Wear - Factory New (FN), Minimal Wear (MW), Field-Tested (FT), Well-Worn (WW), Battle-Scarred (BS), Stickers Holo/Foil/Gold - Katowice 2014, Krakow 2017, Howling Dawn, Katowice 2015, Crown, London 2018, Cologne 2014, Boston 2018, Atlanta 2017, Cluj-Napoca 2015, DreamHack 2014, King on the Field, Harp of War, Winged Difuser, Cologne 2016, Cologne 2015, MLG Columbus 2016, Katowice 2019, Berlin 2019, RMR 2020, Stockholm 2021, Antwerp 2022, Swag Foil, Flammable foil, Others - Souvenirs, Agents, Pins, Passes, Gifts, Music Kits, Cases, Keys, Capsules, Packages, Patches

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submitted by _Triple_ to Csgotrading [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:25 AndrewHNPX The Shawshank Redemption - Movie vs novella

So I just read Rita Hayworth and the Shawshank Redemption by Stephen King, it's so interesting when you compare it to the movie. For one thing it feels a lot...smaller for lack of a better word, obviously being a novella of course. And it's also written entirely from Red's perspective, so we really find everything out secondhand, unlike in the movie. Also Warden Norton is actually the third warden we meet in the story; his character in the movie basically being a composite of all three.

What do you think of what King wrote compared to how the movie depicted it?
submitted by AndrewHNPX to movies [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:19 AshTrash_Art HELP! Could this be diabetes

Hi! I’m a 24 year old woman, so the last few years I’ve struggled a lot with my health and I’m getting concerned.. I don’t have a lot financial support so I wanted to a stronger opinion of I should go to the doctor and get checked. So the suspicion is diabetes. About to two months ago I had something similar to a stroke but they couldn’t see anything on the MRI scans, I went numb on my right side (specifically my face, arm and leg) I couldn’t speak or walk, the day before I had a very severe sudden headache, I felt dizzy and disoriented. I didn’t know if I was gonna pass out or throw up and I could barely speak, after this stroke I had to re learn how to speak but the strange thing is my right foot! It feels like pins and needles every time I try to walk on it and I can’t use the front of it anymore and I’ve lost almost all function in the right foot so I’m currently in a wheel chair. It’s swollen most of the time with some discoloration, the bottom has gotten a lot of callouses, super dry skin and some parts are more gray, pink, red and yellow with darker spots.. I feel little to nothing except the pins and needles with pressure. The other foot is completely normal And i haven’t walked more than a few steps every other day since the stroke. But it gets worse every other day.
Prior to this stroke I would switch between feeling super low energy to the point I felt sick and was gonna pass out but I would usually eat a spoon of Nutella and peanut butter and after 15 min I felt completely fine. The other switch is nausea, dizzy, headaches and severe sweating (just my torso and hands) it’s wet and I feel like I’m overheating no matter what I do. This is combined with very frequent urination.. I will usually stop eating if I’m eating and it will slowly fade.
These things have gotten 10x times worse after the stroke thing..
Hopefully someone sees this and can help me pinpoint so I can go to the doctor
submitted by AshTrash_Art to medical_advice [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:13 AshTrash_Art HELP! Do I have diabetes??

Hi! I’m a 24 year old woman, so the last few years I’ve struggled a lot with my health and I’m getting concerned.. I don’t have a lot financial support so I wanted to a stronger opinion of I should go to the doctor and get checked. So the suspicion is diabetes. About to two months ago I had something similar to a stroke but they couldn’t see anything on the MRI scans, I went numb on my right side (specifically my face, arm and leg) I couldn’t speak or walk, the day before I had a very severe sudden headache, I felt dizzy and disoriented. I didn’t know if I was gonna pass out or throw up and I could barely speak, after this stroke I had to re learn how to speak but the strange thing is my right foot! It feels like pins and needles every time I try to walk on it and I can’t use the front of it anymore and I’ve lost almost all function in the right foot so I’m currently in a wheel chair. It’s swollen most of the time with some discoloration, the bottom has gotten a lot of callouses, super dry skin and some parts are more gray, pink, red and yellow with darker spots.. I feel little to nothing except the pins and needles with pressure. The other foot is completely normal And i haven’t walked more than a few steps every other day since the stroke. But it gets worse every other day.
Prior to this stroke I would switch between feeling super low energy to the point I felt sick and was gonna pass out but I would usually eat a spoon of Nutella and peanut butter and after 15 min I felt completely fine. The other switch is nausea, dizzy, headaches and severe sweating (just my torso and hands) it’s wet and I feel like I’m overheating no matter what I do. This is combined with very frequent urination.. I will usually stop eating if I’m eating and it will slowly fade.
These things have gotten 10x times worse after the stroke thing..
Hopefully someone sees this and can help me pinpoint so I can go to the doctor
submitted by AshTrash_Art to AskDocs [link] [comments]


2023.03.25 04:13 Alstradamus32 What happened to the Snow Crab extinction?

I keep seeing snow crab legs at the store. Are they no longer going extinct? Or do we just not give a shit?
submitted by Alstradamus32 to Cooking [link] [comments]